poetry in motion

2009-11-30T23:44:00.000+08:00

I’ll go out there and make my mistakes.

I’ll fall down, get hurt, cry, laugh, love, and get back up.

I’ll stand on the highest mountaintop and go into the deepest caverns.

I’ll roam across the world, visit the moon and swim in outer space.

I’ll let my imagination run wild and let my spirit soar. Why?

Because when my life flashes before my eyes in those final moments,

I want to have something worthwhile to watch,

with plenty of love and laughter, good times and bad.

I don’t want to regret a thing and I plan not to.

Remember, it’s not usually the things you do that you regret,

it’s the things you don’t do and leave unsaid.

Laugh out loud. Cry in the rain. Love with all your heart and soul. Get hurt.

Tell the truth. Go crazy.

But never forget that you only get one shot.

One shot at this day, one shot at this minute.

One shot at this age. One shot at life.

So make sure your life is one you will enjoy watching in your final moments

2009-11-28T22:14:00.002+08:00

dad told me to take this pic. this is ur daddy. ayah mafia boyan!.
hahahahahaha! no one can attack him in taxi for now!.
kekeke.

anyway. completed my entrepreneur report! left with human behav and cc revisions!.woo!

2009-11-28T02:04:00.002+08:00

sis is still in hospital. im missing my lil bro already. hopefully everything's alright there. i just completed my crm ica2 script within 3 hours! hahaha. managed to recap and do some revisions on other modules. still have entrepreneur report to do i guess. gonna start real soon. pt and cc written test soon.

this year raya has not been really a happy occasion for me. for some reasons.

my mind goes harewire at times. but i know whats overwork or not. training start everyday on monday.

i wonder how is she's doing now...ive got this fear, if there's another guy would just come and swept her off. somehow or maybe everyone will feel this way. but im just paranoid i guess. im still a loser in love and i felt that my expressing of feelings is so my weakness. haix...maybe im bound to loose her anyway.

i prayed to god for everyone's happiness everyday. bt i nid t really find my happiness.

have to stop thinking too much and get on with this challenging life.
just like one republic new song. we keep marching on.

breathe naz. just breathe.

2009-11-27T00:50:00.002+08:00

Am in airport nw.... Sending my bro off to china...gosh he has grown so much...my another small bro did well for his psle.I'm so proud of them both.

2009-11-23T02:15:00.003+08:00

gosh its getting late. here's quick one.
faber drive album is not bad. as in the new one.
im addicted to some of their songs.

sun was great.
i called it suicide sunday.SS.
damn fun studying and at the same time doing report.
managed to get a quick recap on chapters for personal training.
and also. halfway for CRM Report.

went to raffles hospital coffee bean - btw thanks zhenguang for the idea!.
hahaha. and studied there for hours. till hungry and we ended up in laupasat.
i ate hmm...how many satay...more than 15. and not more than...hmm. k nvm.
i feel so fat! hahahaha.

there's this part of me that wants to hit the dancefloor.
g-get up and dance. especially when i saw some blogshop items.
i want a black gazelle adidas black or...hmm...and leather black jacket.
and hmm...pants and t's and
the most importantly new hairstyle.
sis will be getting her hairstylists for me soon.
after this damn hair grow longer.

long hair, with some sort of wavy curls.
im changing my fashion sense again! hahaha.
sian.hahahaha.

for some reasons,
that someone....
changed my life.
its a new perspective.

i want to be a rocker.
punkrocker with flowers on my head.

i fell, i get back up. i look up
with this smile, that nothing seems to matter.

goodnight world.

2009-11-21T01:47:00.002+08:00

was suppose to slp now, decided to blog stuffs about this week.
this lil song by asher book titled try. very niceee and meaningful.stucked.

"If i walk, would you run?
If i stop, would you come?
If i say you're the one, would you believe me?
If i ask you to stay, would you show me the way?
Tell me what to say so you don't leave me.
The world is catching up to you
While you're running away to chase your dream
It's time for us to make a move cause we are asking one another to change
And maybe i'm not ready

Chorus
But I'll try for your love
I can hide up above
I will try for your love
We've been hiding enough

If i sing you a song, would you sing along?
Or wait till i'm gone, oh how we push and pull
If i give you my heart would you just play the part
Or tell me it's the start of something beautiful.
Am i catching up to you?
While your running away to chase your dreams
It's time for us to face the truth cause we are coming to each other to change
And maybe i'm not ready"

tday met with zg mg and kh. finally.hahaha. short time together...
went to watch 2012, kinda nice effects here and there.
e part where he told his dad that he loves him. gosh. that part...that part..wah.
kills me.
hahaha.wth.

so how weekend gonna be, i guess catch up with reports and notes.
keep myself busy though and not brain dead.

for sports wise, im in a huge dilemma.ill take one day at a time for now.
ill give my best whenever i can...

somehow, life's...maybe. but change so much recently.everything seems to get better. thats so important. ive got nothing to say but i just want to live it to the fullest.
afterall, im going for ns. and leaving poly could be the hardest thing yet.many reasons. see just how fast time flies...

i want to change to be a better guy. im different from the rest. it it takes some sort of beating to this, than ill just have to keep on fighting for it.

2009-11-19T00:22:00.002+08:00

when im with you - faber drive.

im lying down at my bed now...my stomach hurts.
for some reason it got worse after training.
luckily malik was there to help.

dad is recovering. mum too. :)
now im giving problems.
ive got some sort of chest pain since last friday.
it hurts so till it makes me just stop wherenever im doing and
just try to calm down. smhw i look tired these days, oh well
i guess this kinda tone things down in my life.

i visited some blogshops...and damn i wanna spend.
i need to save up for studies.
but that one wait for ns la. hahaha
driving license also can wait la.
me.akid.rui.jerome. wants to study in australia.

gd nite.

2009-11-18T10:11:00.003+08:00

lips of an angel - hinder.

woke up...abruptedly.i guess.hahaha.thanks to chacaron ringtones.
okay. yesterday was not bad. i guess, hw report finish!now im left with crm report.
hmm. get a glimpse of 3 meteor shower yesterday. okay 3 meteors. but it comes and go too fast. damn too fast. but worth the wait.

so today will be two napha tester job work! yes ar. pay is coming! hahaha. thank god! dad's sick, recovering though. and now is mum! she got it from dad. what loving couple.hahaha.
blogshop blogshop blogshop.
hahahahaha

u see this lil photo! now guess where is dad?.
he say he very handsome last time.
so u shud see the most not handsome.hahaha
okay. gtg siap for school.
keep it busy yaw.

2009-11-15T15:08:00.001+08:00

all im asking for is to be loved.
that has been my birthday wish since years ago.
it didnt come true.

2009-11-14T00:21:00.003+08:00

this week has been alright i guess.

twice we played l4d2! wth! haha. one is with fiz and khalis.
next one is with fiz,khalis,faritz,kam,vic,is and danial!.
oooo. cant wait for l4d2 already.hahahaha

we called danial living legend, get 46 points for his tp. khalis got 29 only but still both failed tp.hahaha.dan was telling me, eh u got eyecandy in this sch sia...i was wondering who. but wtf. anyways....

studies has been so far so not bad.hahaha.erm. let me see.there were some better discussions in entrepreneurship. oh great, we're planning to enter the entrepreneurship contest in NTU.

speaking of which, me and akid plans to go overseas uni together after graduation. in the sports path, we wanted to be nutritionist,psychologist and some big executives. that has always been a dream.

mum is having some monopause effect, whtver they called it. she would cry and run sudenlly. dad on the other hand is having some body and leg problems because of his cab. his cab is in service due to some breakdown.my lil brother is leaving us for one week for his china trip and he needs money. thank god he have.

im waiting for my pay...my pay... ive been trying to save up for things. im still working towards that though.

i need a new whole wardrobe of clothes.
i need at least three new shoes.one black, one d.blue, one red! hahahaha
i need to blogshop!!!
i need to go for a damn haircut.but i want to keep it long
like william beckett.hahaha.

ohbtw, i broke my specs. sad case...that specs very ex. 6 dollars.haha

and now im breathing deeply,walking backwards, finding straight to call and ask her.
roller coaster favourite ride...let me..one last time.GOODNIGHT. - roller coaster(blink182)

im leaving this blog againnnn.sooonnnnnn.
twilightavenue.

2009-11-11T22:18:00.004+08:00

today was not bad i guess, especially ms prema lesson.
she was very open about human relationships and behavior.
it really got us thinking. it got ME thinking.

nevertheless, ive got so many to say but so little vocab.
im lucky to have syazwan, ming guang, zhenguang and akid as friend.
especially syazwan, knowing him since sec 1, its so great...to know him.
i thank god for such a friend...

knowing about the lyrics of tokio hotel's automatic, i just like it...since two weeks ago.hahaha.

You're automatic,
And your heart's like an engine
I die with every beat
You're automatic,
And your voice is electric
Why do I still believe?

It's automatic
Everywhere in your letter
A lie that makes me bleed
It's automatic
When you say things get better
But they never...

There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
There's no real love in you
Why do I keep loving you

-------------------------------

im fighting for this girl in the battlefield of love.
i cant fight alone.
it takes two.

When she went emo, i wanted to hug her and hear her.
when she says she saw him, my heart goes tumbling all the way down.
when she seems to cant get over him, i felt so ever useless.
when she says she miss him, i felt like commiting suicide.
what a day isnt it?

love is blind. im affected by those wrong doing of others. Not everyone is the same. I am certainly not. WHY THE FUCKING CHEEBYE GUYS MISTAKES THAT MAKES A INNOCENT GIRL CHANGE. and why and what the fucking am i to everyone...

i want to die.
but somehow, my heart is the reason why im still here to stay.
ill be there for you.

2009-11-07T02:03:00.004+08:00

7 november 09, time 2.05am. cold night.
alone in my room, accompanied by music.
here's my reflection.
a need to do this.
im all alone and ive got no one to turn too.

months ago, i remember zhenguang saying to me that struck me,
"naz, you got it all wrong about this because i think you've been hurt by your past"
in some sort of that way. it was during my conversation with joseph about his relationship. back than, i don't even agree with pursue and all because i felt im always been taken advantage off. i seriously don't believe in love. there's no such thing to me...ever. I used to pursue for this girl for 3 years, close to four. im so crazy about her such that losing her changed me so much. nevermind about her, i moved on. with one lesson in mind. that love hurts. i tried again twice in my poly life, and the consequences was bad. one ended up with my classmate and another one ended up choosing me as her friend.

and then, one night. about 12am. there's a girl i called her Sky.(not her real named though) sudennly message me about my friend, named him Star.She's confused and all, and Star has been giving her the wrong signals. Star is everything, he is so close to perfection i guess. Otherwise, which i cant mention it here. Sky love Star. and Star never expect it but wanted Sky to know he meant friendship. Me and Star are good friends. I considered myself the middle this time, knowing what is happening around. Star used to be a playful, and he wanted to change. Not to give the wrong impressions ever again, even to Sky. For some reasons, i get to know Sky better through messages.

Sky feelings is so strong and she refused to forget him. On the other hand, Star began to move on. While getting to know Sky, she told me mostly more of her problems and im glad that she told me. During that point of time,i began to notice Sky's ways. She is different from the rest. She is just so truthfull to her feelings. She do not lie and she do not like to critisize. At the same time, i began to tell myself. Maybe i should start believing it again. That one day, someone would love me and i would be able to open up this heart of mine. Ive always shut myself out from being in relationship such that i do not even care about other feelings towards me. Sky knows this and she keeps showing me her support, for me to be able to slowly open this heart of mine. i eventually try to open this heart of mine.slowly and steadily. i began to see and i force myself to open up.

One night, i was feeling so ever useless and i was down for many many reasons. I just felt that ive been trying to hard and that im a failure in love. Coincidentally, Sky messaged me, asking me how i am. I was pretty struck but at the same time, i felt so fortunate to have such a friend.

Being with Sky one day, we went to watch this great movie. There was one part when she got pretty stress and took out her tep jacket. She uses her hands to cover part of her eyes. I looked at her and she said she got stress. I began to think...why am i always looking at her. Ordered 20 satay stick which ended up i ate 15 of them. We chatted the night away. As we speak, i realise we shared so many things in common. I began to think about her. Could it be? She's been there all these while...On the way home, i keep thinking. and i tell myself. No and that i should never fall for her. She is my best friend and that should stay.

At that point of time. Sky's been trying to forget Star. Here comes this guy named Charm. I guess he was a charmer. Charm wanted Sky so much and he waited Sky for so long. Sky was pretty much falling for him as time goes by... Trying to support Sky's, i keep insisting that Sky should go for Charm. Looking at how Charm waited kinda amaze me at the same time. Knowing i should not fall for Sky, i tried to know this girl named Soul. I forced myself to know Soul so that i would not fall for Sky. However, it pretty much struck me hard down on the ground. A friend, told me somethings that he regretted. Okay, now im falling for Sky already. It is pretty much too late to tell her because she is so close with Charm. Ouh well, i tell myself. Why not i push Sky to Charm. So that i can forget about Sky... and I tried.

IVP 400M final race. in the final race, while waiting for my turn to set up the starting blocks, i remembered seeing her face infront of me. She's not there but my first thought is her. I tried to focus and waith for the bang. True enough, after the bang, my thoughts are all over the place and i remember thinking about SKY while running my 400m, hearing some shout across the stadium i wanted to win at least third... i dived in and got my personal best timing. i got injured, twisting my ankle. As the paramedics arrived and iced my leg, i think... why her in my mind. i believe it was all worth it.

One day before a friend's event, that very same night. I remember telling Sky that i wish other girls were to be like her. Im truthfull to this and till now i still believe this. She said the same to me which make me realise i might actually have a chance too. I told her, i feared that she might change one day. Because people do change when something hit them hard...

As time goes by, I felt ever so close to Sky. and this time my feelings is strong. I remember feeling so happy and excited that is beyond explanations when i see her outside 7/11 near big splash. i felt so happy to see her. We were helping out for a friend's event. The weather was so so hot and we went to get ourself some ice creams. While walking, Sky told me that she do not want Charm already. Because of Charm acting all weird. I remember feeling a little greatful yet worried. I replied, "its really up to you, you decide." That point of time i felt some sort of glimmer for hope...
As the day was about to end, Charm came to approach Sky.He's picking her up for movie i guess. I saw Charm from far and my guess were he was good looking. I can see Sky's beautiful smile and she's so happy to see him. I walk quicker to the toilet with a friend, trying to ignore. I felt hurt. I felt pain and i tried to ignore it. She wanted to wait for us and i told her to go first. I insist on this for some reasons. This really hurts. It got worse when i was in the bus on the way home.

Everynight i began to think of the consequences that might happen. I really love Sky and it hurts to think that she might ended up with Charm. Should i tell her? or should i not? I decided that i should tell her because i just cant loose her.

That wednesday, i told her what ive been feeling. I know she was very much taken aback about it. I knew and ive thought many of the consequences. I know that im a good friend of Star and if she ever to see me and Star around, she would not be able to take it.

I trust my heart and i think, maybe i deserve this second chance.what was i thinking, am i asking for my heart to be broken again. Losing my handphone could not have been a bad time, i could not contact her and i miss her so much. i prayed and ask god to please please take care of her. what else can i do after that camp.

Now, finally i can message her. For some reasons, the way she replied is so different. Our conversations are soo different. She told me to not have any expectations. I just wanted to assure her and not pressure her so i keep telling myself that time will tell and that i have no expectations. I agreed to pretend during training that there is nothing between us. However i felt that, i am not able to even get closer and communicate with her because we can only meet during training times. While trying to talk to her when we are left alone together, i try to look at her but there was no eye contact at all. She seems so closed up, refusing to open up.

I saw her blog and i know that Sky's begining to miss Charm, i was never there all along. Charm is army boy and i felt so happy for him. It hurts to know this. But why is Sky not telling me at the same time?. I felt that we are distancing apart.If there were to be a glimmer of my image in her heart, i would be very happy enough. I kinda guess, not being able to spend time with her and looking at her the way she's distancing from me. I didnt even had the chance to meet her alone and spend some good time together till today.im so scared to think she's going to leave me one day. I felt so lonely out of sudden.

Im simple, i do not play hot and cold. I felt that love is about truthfullness.No secrets and yet just pure.

I tried telling her what i feel, she mistook it that i think she's close to me when Charm is not close to her. she did however mentioned that im forever a good friend to her. I thought to myself, i can't do this. i just can't do this anymore. Maybe if we are not together, i can never bring myself to be her friend. i just can't. The answer were so obvious and i do not know why im still hoping.I've been trying to close the gap between her and myself. im just so tired out of sudden. i love and love has expectations. because u believe two is better than one. the truth hurts.

True enough, we all changed.

A while ago, i met Syazwan and we talked about my problems, i told him. "Wan, aku dah tak tahu aper nak buat.." He asked why and i said" Wan, aku sayangkan dier wan.Aku tidak bersempat untuk bilang dier." Wan look at me and consoled me as a best friend would do. I teared...just like that.

Even as im writing this, i cant seem to stop tearing.Im so weak for a guy.

"I wish i could have told you the things that i kept inside.
but now i guess it is just too late
So many things reminds me of you...
i hope that you can hear me.
i miss you, this could be my goodbye."

Time now,4.05am. im shall go to sleep now. im feeling so ever tired.
maybe it is all for the best. i just don't see any good in this.
i won't regret saying that i wish other girls were to be like you.

ill wait for you no matter what.

2009-11-06T17:32:00.000+08:00

will b writing here till some time.
back to blogging. with blogspot.

2009-02-03T22:43:00.002+08:00

bonjour...
je ne sais pa, everybody, je men sens fatigue'.

meaning.
hi.
nice to see you, everybody. im tired.lols.
french hangover.cb.
haa.

anyway.ppl.
do take note that ill be updating more of my entries in

http://www.nazuya.livejournal.com

do check it out kays.take care ppl.

2009-01-25T14:04:00.002+08:00

will be going out with my neigbours. the 784 neighbours....
the 7 of us reunited.family and friends. haa. cant wait.
venue east coast, time 4pm, its time to rock e world there.
take lorry go thr.

i used to stay at block 784,
this block is special. 10 years there. knew everyone. from
1st floor to 16th floor. formed a soccer team. had cny and hari raya
celebration together...

until 07, i moved to block 708. due to the haunt in my house.
hate it.

i miss them alot. we grew up together. we promised that we all will have a sports car.we all will...

studies aside. time to enjoy.

2009-01-22T00:31:00.003+08:00

i cant help but wonder..
certain things that u think...does really happen...
not that i expect it...
it happen lots of time...
fate?
im not sure either...
but now... i felt that something is amiss.
something empty...empty feeling seems to happen
out of a sudden. and worst things is your're thinking about it...
and that it is something that you know can never happen...
you'll begin to doubt yourself...
why does this things happen...

im happy that my friends are all happy..
but why am i not satisfied...
am i the sadist one...
becuz thrs no one to cheer me up...

ooh well. im still changing...
im not sure. im very not sure...
friends dialled. couples broke up...
here and there.
everywhere...

i need'a break.
a real break...

alone wathching the sunset is an ideal time for me...
i gotta start my adventure...to start photography.
to start enjoyin great music...to start some designing of stuffs...
to enjoy my life...

life is not all abt training...
still.
somehow i felt lonely at times.
sucks.
i shud be happy for wht i am now.

nvr shout nvr.

2009-01-18T12:25:00.003+08:00

last year. the men team champion belongs to VANIS...
the team name that consist of NAZRI AND KHALIS...
tis year the men team champion that consist also
of NAZRI AND KHALIS won. but with the name of
THE PEN IS LONG.

we won people. thank god. the almighty.
we kinda prayed for a miracle to beat phillip team.

the after effects. i cant walk propelly now.
muscle aches all around...

imagine. running 20km in macritchie...then kayak...
then to lower piece and run to nyp...along there.
we climb 25 stairs, eat wasabi, abseils, cycle,
paddle and run for close to 30km for 3 hours at least..

oh just imagine that.

2009-01-15T22:22:00.003+08:00

gawd...im feeling so dizzy and heaty now...
and cold too. not too sure. but im having a bad fever now i guess.
its real bad. im feeling so restless and tired...

and i have a synergy race this saturday. that is to contest of title holders.
we were last year winners and we cannot afford to lost this time...
me and khalis wanna win.
our team name.
the pen is long.

it has been a real crazy week, trainings, lessons, presentations, test
back to back...and darn. cant take it.
i kinda had it after training yesterday...

ouh btw ive got my beijing adidas demolisher spikes.thanks to my parents.
they sponsored it...
haa...

exam is coming soon...and soo too attachment.
im gonna have one hell of a crazy 09 year...

time flies.

2009-01-14T00:34:00.002+08:00

let me light up the sky...
let me lit it up for u...
let me tell you why...
i would die for u...

nobody knows how it ends tonite.

im kinda looking at fourwalls.thkin of my boring life.
darn.i gotta bring down the curtain yea...

business finance ica 2molo. bad bad....
i hate finance. cb.

camp impact is canceleed. pwer la!.
haa. can concentrate on adventure race liao.

my life. its an avenue.
whr nothing has it meets.
with only myself that says the last...
last words that meant anything.

okay now...im fking tired.
i need a break.
darn this blog is boring.
no taga at all.
darn.
c. ive got boring life...

gotta sustain.

2009-01-13T00:09:00.002+08:00

darn.
okay ive got a new personal best for 200m and 400m.
darn nonsense.
wht did i get myself into hur?.
freak.

camp impact ish coming!.i guess.
and of course!. adventure race! synergy this saturday.
darn pack schedule.

fred perry jacket...

im curently down with an eye infection!. cb.

2009-01-09T00:33:00.003+08:00

i don't know what to do next
keep pretending. keepin quiet.
keepin shut.

its really weird that we are not talking.
okay at least to me...
we are frieds arent we. but why are we doing this.
why are there nothing.

im resisting the urge to press that button.and
say a hi or say heys. pathethic i knw. that urge came
because its just yesterday. uve seem to look like
you're having problems. im not the sort to lie and predict.
bt i can tell it just by looking at you.

im tongue tied whenever i saw you.its seems my body auto muted.
bt there are soo much things to say to you..
we've may got off to a wrong foot. its a bad start.
i only judged you when i first saw you in training and in school.
and i only judge you through those sms and chats.
and im sure you're a real nice person.
its just that i felt something different.
we can talk...only if we want to. all day long.
its really nice talking to you...really.

i felt that i want you because i know i can change your life.and be able to
just see you smile is my very own happYNESS.u need not.

its just my point of view. not meant to hurt anyone.
it seems too fast. 2 months that is. if you can remember.
there's a meaning behind the stars ive made. there is.
its all now left behind as memories. bt stars stays at it is ryte?
it only dies after a collision...
you've told me you're dating someone.yes i respect that. ive prayed and wish
you happiness.it glows. yes it is. but only if you shine it on the light.
and that light is me. im sure. that card is nowhere to be found. for all i know.
its nowhere in sight even near her table.

i remembered clearly. its starts off with.
picking up a jewel email. you've pick it up and said it got you...
and then...
songs.guitar.sings.shyness.
marketing project ica
6 not on 4th bd.
lovebug wanted then 1234 plain white t's.
crisy fries of long john's and mac's good aft training.
till 4am hardwork for mktg...
being ticklish.
a walk to remember movie.
bummer!
love is like wind. you cannot see it but you can always feel it
red ipod. red colour, paper, pen, music, checkered just for awesome
toffe nut latte. ooh not anymore, toffe nut frap.
starbucks. did goes to sakae.
guess your sibling. one. younger one.
dreamz fm
\and
and....
lastly, im not psychic...
can never be. to know wht ur thinking and wht u felt.
to know...and try to forget these things.
tell me. is it easy to forget. can i do...
these are most of it of the same common as i liked
ive tried. bt loneliness and emptiness
resulted on me thnking these things...

is my first time i ever tried for someone i didnt know..
its seems to fast and that made me look like a stalker
did i just said that? ouh well.
it makes you wonder...isn't it obvious.
may not b. but then someone' dating her...
and i cant...not even anything...
its fair ryte.

it took one perth and one week.
and den gone.
im being truthfull here.
i have no bad intentions
im hurt.easily hurt.
im soft. not hard..
ive tried.and ive never tried this hard.
i felt that im judged by looks.
if onli you knew...
my friends knew, i hate telling them.
but they were worried. and ive got let it out...

what can i do...
say its truth...
whatever things that matters will break into two...
its just anyone bt you...
will you ever understand...

confession.
if onli u knew...
im sorry in anyway...

2009-01-08T23:20:00.002+08:00

its kinda weird.
can i just straighten things out.
can i just say something.
not that being straight forward is a bad thing.

we all have problems in our life.
i have mine. but im taking things real easy.
soo much different compared to any years.

in anyway
ive got a tough decision.
should i tell coach or not.
as in my track and field coach.
because im in the school soccer also.
worst is ytd training ive clocked my fastest 200m timing.
darn thang. and ive got to run for singapore first all comers meet this sunday
ooh noo!. 400m. ouh well. we'll see how it goes.

might be getting new spikes. haha! hee.
anyway...the sch owns me money. whrs my money!.

life is not just sport and studies huh.
i wanna do somethin different.
poems, traveling, and of course discovering.
let embark on these things shall we.

first thing i need ish.
a camera
a notebook.
and ouh...hmm...
something...nt a thing bt...somthang...

=)

2009-01-05T23:31:00.002+08:00

i give up.
i surrendered.
i laid down.
i look up.
i knew it all.
and yet.

i think about it.
over and over again.
we're trading heartbeats.
would you ever believe me..
the questions meant for..
i soo beat up myself down.
so hard.
maybe its the best.
maybe...
just maybe.

maybe we'll find something better.

oh babyy.

i writing myself new poems everyday.

2009-01-03T21:29:00.002+08:00

darn. im soo lazy to studiii for efma.
ive managed to complete my ict part and also currently doing my
mktg part. projs and more prjs...now esw thrs anther proj.
ouh well.

im staying at home 4 e weekend. darn weird i know.
3rd day of 09. more are yet to be promised..

online shopping. at fueled by ramen store.i want! soon soon.
and i wanna buy tis black slipper. wait..shud i buy black or white.
votes please...

will be going to hospital for medical checkup. haha.got this sickness been bothering me. but ooh well. its recovering i guess. ouh please...
hmm. ive got some pimples. small ones. but ouh no!> its freaking me. darn

okay.
im training hard. for soccer...to get back to where i am.
met a friend the other day. vijay. he's a ex national player too.
ill get there. trust me...

okay i need a few things to shop...

wishlist.
- new phone
- new earpiece
- 3 new jeans
- 3 new shorts
- 8 t-shirts
- 3 shirt
- 1 formal shirt
- 5 polo t-s
- 1 fred perry jacket
- 2 pair of shoes
- 1 spike shoe
- 1 shin pad.
- 1 bvlgari watch
- 1 black adidas watch
- 1 burberry perfume
- fish eye 2 camera
- hard disk for songs.
- acessories
- new camera
- new glasses
- new spectacle.
- new haircut
- new bags

i shop like a girl ryte. eh sht up. im just listin of things to buy on 09.
ive got 360 days. haha!

steadiii steadiiii....

2009-01-02T00:25:00.002+08:00

happy new year everybody...
best of wishes. thanks to those who sent me messages.
thanks. real thanks. and ouh. ive finally talk to one of
my very old friend...good that he's doing good.
he's a singapore national player, soccer, hmm won the colours award.
was my teamate for 5 years. friends for 7 years. darn. time flies.

memorable 2008...goodbye 08...
im kinda emotional now cux, 08 bought me great great memories.
ive change soo much from last year...realli do.

im kinda hesistant to know that a friend of mine don't want to quit
smoking. i noe. im just a friend. and i should not really care ryte...im not ur bf or somethin...less smoking won't improve either...
but my uncle died because of smoking. ive got working colleagues who died because of smoking. you're only 17. u'll be more beautiful if you stop now. didnt i tell you before that your innocence and eyes moved me. so please will you stop...
will you. i don't know why i still care. but you are part of me already.part of my life...a friend...take care will you.

u got me thinking and start praying for u.ive been doing so for long...

to me friendship has no boundaries. i love all my friends. i really do.
my main new year resolution, that is to keep the hard things - friendship and trust.

sometimes i just felt sad, angered at times. why? im searching for the answers.
we all wonder. why arn't we not embrace and love by a partner...
ouh well. if its not meant to be.
ultraviolet suitehearts. not sweet heart.

ull never know anyway.
we'll find it somehow.
tonight.

2008-12-30T22:37:00.003+08:00

okay i gottta be honest with u.
im freaking tired!!!!
haha.

i kinda woke up at 4am...
then msn was like being bomb...
i slt at my sofa. leaving my lappy beside me!.
shaf said im a music store.
okay shhh. keep it low profile.
so wth im writing it here for. wad nonsense.
anyway. sorry shaf!. guiltiiiiii....

ouh well. ive got this problem.
when walking around in sch! i tend not to see friends
walking past me! argh!. im sorri im sorri!. just that. my mind been
busy wit lots of things. so kinda. walkabout aimlessly thinking! haha
sorry dear friends...

new year is coming so whts my resoulution.
hmm...better be good!

ill share it wit u if u share it wit me...

haha. ive taken big steps to go for some things in my life.
darn. its all abt living it to e fullest.
hmm...

i still do care. why do i?
can't i forget about it...
can i..
take care...

soccer ivp is coming.
of course im nt selected.
one year absense leh cb.
haha. wah lao.
but got some encouraging words from coach.
ill be kicking balls sooner...
im getting betta! yeeehaaa!.haha

ill be nice to u if ur nice to me. simple okay?
darn. i just realise something.
i nvr like a malay girl in my life.
till tis yr. wtf.
wds wrong wit me...
but i dunno why...

2008 has been the first time of doing things.

first time list...

ran 400m in ivp.
contact major sponsors! and event organizers.
gym admin manager! thanks to chorhoon and ismail.
back in soccer training after a year.okay 1 and a half year.
baked my own cookies.
cook my own baked rice..ehh literally.haha!
had 4 phone changes bt ended up with an old one.
get to know new friends in sbm thru camps! ogl!.
open up and express myself.
did some damages in track.
did some exotic dance in aerobics room.
organize isg! haha.
5 earpiece change. just to suit my type of bass songs.haha
create some nice piece of art for someone...
had nice memories la...

overall been a good year.
cux i did not smoke!. cb.
haha.

would'nt it be gd if u don't try to act...
as in just be yourself can?.
people like just the way u are okay...
no worries. because what u need is someone that
just likes the way u are. simple...
kick off that bad habit.
improve..
ill be gld to help u as a friend.
okay will u?

just for a fren...

aites cha lo!.

im in a mood for adventure!.
a simple plan that is.

2008-12-29T23:13:00.002+08:00

im home at last.
kinda felt weird. wen malik,sihao and akid
were not there aft training. haa.
well...u know wht i meant.

bodywatch gym has open. and me and khalis were e first to ever enter it!.
haha. cool. kinda woke up 6am in the mornin. had prayers...and meet khalis in sch at 8 plus. den breakfast. den gymmin eh!. haha.upper body exercise...super shag la.
den off we went for lec. aaaa...
not realli lecture la. cux we stayed outside lec room and make noises.
haha. charlene is just back from usa and she kinda bought us bubble gums
and candies. haha.

den ict. tok cock to the lecturer. about google reader. haha. 5%. lols. i tink im damn good at it. haha!.

thrs test nxt weeks and project deadline...

im superdarn tired...i hate being lonely. argh!.
im lonely la cb.

haha. as in when going home and to school.
lols.

soccer training is not bad. kinda improve as time goes by...
i need to work a hell lot on passing. darn. even coach says so...
okay ill work hard den...

i need a break for at least one week to catch up with projs..and test studies...
ooh ooh naz. darn. one more weekend please.

im still toungue tied.
a smile that i could afford. with eyes in other way.
ouh well. that beautiful darn thang!.
who wud have admit it?
i do. bt ppl don't understand.
ouh well. i treasure friendship more i tell u okay!.
haha.

another heart calls.

2008-12-28T17:20:00.003+08:00

yes ar, went shopping yesterday with my sec friends,zhenguang, yenlee, eveleen,ming guang and xian yong.kinda had fun la. i went to bugis first den meet them at vivo. viva la vivo eh!. haa.

shopped around. look at those year end sales, darn those sales...were tempting
but BUT~... the designs sucks. especially those in topman, zara, river island, armani and pull and bear. actually all of them la...onli some nice shoes spotted at zara..and polo t's at topman. hmm...shop....till we eventually ended up at tangs!. and wth!. i saw this fred perry jacket! and whoala! i love it...
i love it to the max. its the same on lyk the pic above...
cost: $225
argh fuck.cb.

okay...nvm.aft everythin kinda meet up at steffi place for supper and card games...kinda had fun with e games. lols...

ouh yea, we're planning a getaway plan for new's year eve. haha.cool. hopefully thrs nthin for me tat day.

chinese new yr coming. i nd to buy new clothes! haha. house visiting duh~. lols.
i miss my chinese grandma already.haha. ah ma! nunu misses u!.

darn. sch starts tomorrw. im so lazy to goo....soccer trainings on mon, track training on tuesday and friday. adventure race is coming!!!!!!!!!!haha.
and also...camp impact. haha. all comers meet...
darn. so packed...and exam is coming. argh. oh noooooo...

i hate to admit this...smhw. i felt that im a failure.cux i try to hard for certain things in life. especially in relationship...i don't know if ppl deserve my love. cux i never had any...and it always end up with me getting none.bt just heartbreaks.
heartbreaker yea. ouh well. ths is life. im askin for it.

why am i always too late...

how can i even show u who am i really when i don't even had a chance aft the first impressions.second impressions? second chance?. ouh fuck. stp thinkin abt it.

...slp

2008-12-27T14:50:00.000+08:00

if thrs one thing to say...
friends are hard to keep.

2008-12-24T10:35:00.003+08:00

ive finally meet my secondary sch friends! since like a month?
darn. i miss them. its feels so good to see thier faces and smiles all over them
haa! people like ming guang, zhen guang, yen le, elearnor, xian yong. haa.
those were the closest friends i had in secondary school.
im so thankful to them for being understanding, with me being pack on my schedules...
ouh well. thank you dearest!

monday soccer training is darn fun la. im getting back to match fitness. level is not there yet. more to be work at. and yesterday track training kinda took the hell out of my shin. its so darn painful la. haa.

anyway, i saw sir timonthy the other day!. he offered me a job at one of his club. tkd coaching that is! haa. bt i kinda need to do some documents settling to start coaching those kids. haa!. those tkd days were sooo memorable. darn... i miss thrashing my opponents. i regretted not continuing the nationals training. i remembered knowing kim, he's one of the best in korea. darn. long time didnt contact him..

ouh yeap. im going out with my track teamates later! woot! anyway. merry christmas to my friends out there! its the day of giving and happiness aites! so come on ppl! turn it up!

woke up this morning with nice words from akid and khalis, im so thankful to them. they are the ones, that has been there for me for the whole time. since start to the end. haa. its okay you two...naz will be alright. he knew when he first saw her. he knew that theres something different about that girl. but ouh well, god is fair ryte. all i need to know is everything is worth it. no regrets.
ive pray to god for....thats why god tells me. ouh naz. there's so many stars out there. this might not be the time. u got such a good future ahead.

mom and dad kinda hug me yesterday aft what ive told them. thanks to both. sis is a lil straight forward. too much. but its okay. nevertheless i love them.

im addicted to the all american rejects songs. that is mona lisa and another heart calls!. people you must listen to them!. go buy their album. its on top. its out!. haa.

2008-12-21T22:28:00.001+08:00

its always good to know that your friends said
that you've change. for e better of course. haa!

hmm. i wanna change more. better! i cant wait for changes..
i cant wait to rock the world.
self confidence is the key. key to almost everything.
haa.

one week of break gonna end. so im left with one week.
what am i gonna do this last week!. catch up with studies can i?
oh sure sure. projects are pilling! go go naz. u can do it.

soccer training tomorrow. im not sure if i shud go. shud i?
i want to.

2008-12-20T13:07:00.002+08:00

one week has passed.
i didnt blog for almost a week..
ive got good darn reason for that!. i do i do.
haa.

ive been quite lonely for the past few days. i hate this feelings.
i miss someone to. but im covering it up. ive injured my shin again.
its really painful. but im trying to ignore it.
i got fever yesterday...
didnt even get to meet my secondary sch friends which is really dissapointing.
projects are moving darn slowly.

ouh well. now the questions remains. when she's back yesterday. what is going to happen? what?. how... will she give me the chance. its darn too obvious that naz likes her. unless she could not see it...

the world has been tough on naz. especially on his love life. such a failure he is. but he remains positive about it. he still believes thats some good things abt her that naz coulc not see.

she's just too beautiful in my eyes.just so so...

2008-12-13T23:34:00.003+08:00

a week of pain that is...
im finally home after 2 days of camp in sch.
track camp that is. such a nice camp. really enjoy it.
everyone did a good job and im very tired. ive tire myself out soo much
that i cant recover my body well..
best part of the camp is when we hide at the steeple chase area for one hour.
gazing on stars and the bright moon.

my body is in the bad state. i really cannot cope with it...
im soo freakingly tired.
all thanks to projects,tutorials, studies, training, camp meetings, and
camps.

2 weeks of break that is. but but!. there's 2 projects to do! marketing and ict.
darn.kinda stress. but i gotta finish all my tutorials and revision asap...
also, i gotta buy new clothes and change new hairstyle again!. woot!

i dunno why but i got these feelings that ive just have to keep certain things to myself. hmm.
she just left for perth, australia.
and ouh! im praying hard for her to be happy and safe there. for some reasons i actually did that.
but why am i doing that?.
hais...
before she left i actually managed to give her the gift that i made especially fer her.
im so afraid that she won't like it. im hopefull.
when i passed her the present, the smile on her face silence my mind.
time kinda stood still and yet all i could ever do is....tongue tied.
she'll be back soon i guess..

she told me she have problems with a boy. but i dunno what is it all about.
maybe someone she already likes? and im just there doing my best looking like an idiot. running in the background...and ouh, she recently has stopped replying to my messages. so what does that mean?. not interested...gosh...
tell me.if that were to happen. what would i do?...
if then...ill just move on with my life then...

heartbreaking it will be.but isn't that should be usual to me?. giving my best in every person i love always ended me being hurt.im asking for it isn't it?hai...sad
im sad.

could it becux of my look? cux im nt good looking either.

2008-12-07T16:26:00.002+08:00

this is the current progress of the card i made for someone special.
its like i start at 11pm all the way to 6am.
gosh. i cant believe it im doing this. so far so good.
more betta to be complete. darn. my hands are tired.
hopefully she likes it.

2008-12-07T01:08:00.002+08:00

first of all.
there are many reasons that why i decided to block
users from seeing my blog.
i felt that i should keep my life to myself
until im able to be with someone who can share it with mine...

i cant afford to delete my blog because there are soo many
great memories to be kept close in my heart...

im soo sad and depress for the past two weeks. reason was.
the girl that im begining to like. i know this sounds weird.
ive just got to know her only a month. but before knowing her..
ive always saw her and i always felt that something is different about her.
if not why would i not try to knw her ryte?
she is just different and decent look. ive tell myself that she is
my eye candy and thats all it gotta be.

but it started off when i try to add her on friendster. and than i managed to
get her msn add after her training. i still remember those days...how much i want
to know her. kinda managed to have some conversation on msn and sms. she's has
this energy that goes around her. and i knw. she is somehow the kind of girl i want. but isn't she just a crush?. oh well. we started off quite well. im able to help her with her marketing projects and we joked alot. had some same interest in music and we also like starbucks. haa. worst is. i kinda guess her birthday and siblings almost prefectly. and she too guess mine quite nicely.
...

recently, she somehow kinda never replied my msgs. which really breaks my heart... for some reason. she's avoiding me which is really obvious... and i felt that i must have done something wrong did i? this time...i really want to get to see how...even for lunch but she keeps avoiding it with other reasons...

but why does she change her mind. im hurt..
im hopefull that she don't think that i look kinda like a stalker.
because truthfully, i just want to know the girl that ive been amazed at.
is that wrong?

all i could ever do for now is ive made her a birthday present. in which. everything is designed just for her. ive spend hours trying to figure out nice things for her...
ive doing it with all my heart. hopefully she will not avoid me anymore. please will you don't avoid me.im being truthfull and honest here. i like you. simple as that. i don't have any bad intentions. seriously because you were the first and only girl that i asked for her msn add. the first...

oh god. don't make me let go off her because she wants me too...
she is just someone that i first look at. and wonder...
who is this girl!...ive never this different before whenever i see the rest...
because i knew. you could be the one that i can share my love with..

give me a chance will you?.
im hopefull...

2008-12-07T00:37:00.000+08:00

Second Chance"

I found the phone
I must’ve missed your message
You got it wrong, It wasn’t what your friend said.
I can tell by your tone, I’ve taken it too far again.
Just when I thought I'd gone and fixed it all again.

Your friends are telling you, You gotta move on.
Just when I thought I'd gone and wrecked it all again.
You turned around so I could tell you what took so long.
I don’t know why i ever waited to say.
'cause I’m just dying just to see you again .

Instead of holding you, I was holding out.
I should’ve let you in, but I let you down.
You were the first to give ,I was the first to ask.
Now I’m in second place, to get a second chance.

I should've known, took you and I for granted
Gotta let you know, I was never underhanded.
Tell by your tone, I’ve taken it too far again.
Just when I thought I'd gone and fixed it all again.

My friends are telling me they saw you with someone.
Just when I thought I'd gone and wrecked it all again.
You turned around so I could tell you what took so long.
I don’t know why i ever waited to say.
'cause I’m just dying just to see you again .

Instead of holding you, I was holding out.
I should’ve let you in, but I let you down.
You were the first to give, I was the first to ask.
Now I’m in second place, to get a second chance.

My last mistake, putting my friends first.
I tried to laugh it off but I made things worse.
You were the first to give, I was the first to ask.
Now I’m in second place, to get a second chance.

What you give is always what you get.
There's so much I haven't given yet.
If you could give another second chance.
Just when I thought I'd gone and fixed it all again.

My friends are telling me they saw you with someone.
Just when I thought I'd gone and wrecked it all again.
You turned around so I could tell you what took so long.
I don’t know why I ever waited to say.
'cause I’m just dying just to see you again .

Instead of holding you, I was holding out.
I should’ve let you in, but I let you down.
You were the first to give, I was the first to ask.
Now I’m in second place, to get a second chance.

My last mistake, putting my friends first.
I tried to laugh it off but I made things worse.
You were the first to give I was the first to ask.
Now I’m in second place to get a second chance.

Instead of holding you, I was holding out? (second chance)
I should’ve let you in, but I let you down (second chance)
You were the first to give, I was the first to ask? (second chance)
Now I’m in second place, to get a second chance.

2008-12-04T00:16:00.002+08:00

imnot sure if certain things i do
kinda got the wrong impression of me...
am i a bad person. hopefully not duh...

its just that i wasnt too sure about myself.
sometimes i just do things wholeheartedly.
and my intentions is always being nice to people around me...

im saying here. i have no intentions to do or hurt anyone.
those close to me. they knew what kind of person i am.
i just felt that im always the one being against for the wrong reason.
im a simple person. u hurt me. thats alright cux i won't hurt u back.
ill move on.

so tell me what did i do wrong?

being quiet doesn't pay is it?
prioritize is wrong?
being nice is wrong?

am still i am.

2008-12-02T22:28:00.002+08:00

2 more test for this week.
3 more proj for next week.
1 more proj for next 3 weeks.

and then ica's and exam. and off we go for IPP.
darn time flies. can it stop.

im in nd of slp. dun be a walkin zombie naz.

2008-12-02T01:47:00.002+08:00

i know its weird.
im a guy. what do i blog for. darn.

haa. anyway.
today is seriously one of the most crazy days in my life.
ive got hafiz. track brothers, and other great friends to thank for.
i didnt expect my day to change so drastically. darn.

im in the school soccer. Nyp Soccer. and Nyp athletics. thanks to hafiz and mr lionel and victor. also. thanks to my track teamates for being supportive.

hmm. also. would like to thank evelyn for her great ideas...
kinda need to brainstorm about somethin.
that associates with

music,red,checkered,pen and paper, simple, short and sweet with stars.

i just gotta do it. everythin. as in really everythin!. my energy level is on the up! haha. sounds wrong. whatever. haha. cux ive been feeling so tired for the past few weeks.

just so u knoe.

2008-11-30T23:38:00.002+08:00

okay its official.
im injured. like againnnnnnnn.
fuck. i hate this. its splint shin. darn.
i cant even sprint properlly la.

friday training is crazy again. 400mx10.
but escaped to pool training. as in hydro la.
haha. hydro training is real tiring. my leg were wobbly and
weak. darn. conditioning of muscles again duh...

there's ict test tmolo! darn. haven start studying. die die la naz.
gosh ytd, is not bad. went out with classmates. shop a lil bit.
than watch body of lies! darn good movie!. we kinda saw anuja. gosh.
after the movies. i got some terrible headache. kinda had a quarell
at bus 190. this phinoy maid keep pushing me...was darn frustrated.
so i kinda tell her. what the fuck your pushing for. there's enough space there.
nabei.

today. i managed to do my proj!. well done. but still. more2 to do!.
track camp is coming. ipp is coming. all comers meet is coming.
and birthdays are cmoning!.

so yea.

2008-11-28T02:26:00.002+08:00

ive just woken up. its 2am plus oreadi.
darn those nitemares.

hmm. im missing my sec friends. got so darn busy.
and they usually meet every friday in which is also my training days.
sad case. ouh well. im definately sure we can meet up soon sometime.

projects to complete: efma, finance, law and marketing.
tests to complete: ict,french,

this things are really freaking out the hell ouf of me. its darn difficult.
worse. they already change several concepts ands it difficult to get the
another class to teach us a thing or two.

most probably, i gonna enjoy my saturday with my classmates outing.
and then full blast study and proj work on sunday. darn darn im tired.
im very tired..

training is getting tough. monday shall be my weights training. weds is speed and friday is lactate treshold. darn. im using training to release those stress.

in terms of relationship. ouh well. i kinda gotta chill down or cool down? cux everyone is getting busy ryte?!. and i think my schedule is the worse. so much so when i arrived home at 8pm. its feels damn weird to be home early. so what's home..

im not sure if what im doing is right. afterall this is what i want, i want a balance life. that has the least change the life of people. ouh well. sometimes even friends don't understand how you felt. certain things is hard to explain. i might be bad and i might always give the wrong impression in year 1. but ive definately back to my old self like in the sec days.

for now. i felt that i should care more abt my friends and my parents especially. life's is too short. look at us. we're ending our year 2 soon. it felt like ive just entered year 2.

so if you ask me who's she.
she's a nice piece of art. but that itself i would say
becux of those chat's we've made. her birthday is coming.
so what is it gonna be. would it be a lookout for a star named aft her.
that's the walk to remember. if anyone watched it...

and my classmate asked. how has it been btween u 2. i can only replied.
hmm. what else? already something good that happen in my life.
contented that is. but ouh while...ive say my prayers. the rest is....

wonder....who will ever know how i felt. its bad to keep things to yourself...
ouh well.. not everyone understands...

And every night I miss you
I can just look up
And know the stars are
Holding you, holding you, holding you
Tonight.

aiya. it's gonna be hard for me to update that often anymore.
darn. anyway. take to those readers of my blog! ca lo! merci!.

current songs : virtual dj trying to mix the scientist of coldplay and nickelback faraway..

okay. gtg slp again. im so darn tired.cb la.

2008-11-26T01:39:00.001+08:00

okay i don't know why.
why do i insist?.
why do i.
why why why why la cb.

crush crush crush.

i like her.
argh fk fk fk.

slp i need.
slp slp slp.

2008-11-25T23:49:00.003+08:00

no matter how difficult it is.
i still gotta do it. the projects
and tests are soo fucking difficult.
and how in the hell am i gonna get to university?!.
gpa is only 2.5. see. blame myself for my year 1 of slacking.

right here right now. i have to do it. i can do it! yesh i can!.
it'll be over soon i guess.

hmm...
unexpected things do happen. but its how u handle those things that matters ryte!.
so yah. this is easy to handle. i cant believe it. until they told me. but oh well. im here in this world. and thats enough to change someone's life.

training intensity is crazy. but oh well. we can get to the sea games!.
we're training for sea games. for singapore!.

i don't know why. im feeling so tired and restless these few days. and darn!. i gotta wake up! and start moving my ass...

hmm below is the picture for akid's birthday celebration. planned? byme!

2008-11-22T12:17:00.004+08:00

gosh,i woke up this morning feeling that pain
in the core muscles. argh.
coach training is real crazy
we did 200m x 20. omg. i cant take it.
before the training, i was actually sleepin in clubroom.
got soo much lack of sleep.

wednesday was fun. having to think that there's test.
i actually targetted the 8th position for the road run.
haa. was running happily. and then afther the run.
coach said. hmm naz. u need not do the test today.
so sit there and rest. wtf?!.

okay i need a real good break this weekend.
gonna complete all my tutorials. thats they way naz!

projects are pilling up.oh no oh no...

khalis and me form a team for the upcoming
adventure race. our team is called THE PEN IS LONG.
wtf. anyone get it?

i being honest.
im definately.
awesome.
cux starbucks the best
for us both.

2008-11-18T10:24:00.004+08:00

ive got new spikes!
thanks to malik.haa!
its the adidas meteor, red and gold.
not tat im bullshitin abt gettin mosts golds in events.
gonna make sure that im not gettin use to custioning
shoes but light weighted ones. darn important.
it kinda improves my speed. but endurance wise, is still a doubt.

test has been alright. manage to answers most questions!. yeap!.
and tomorrow is efma. and ive yet to study!. gonna chiong tonite!.
i am gonna to. weds gonna be hell. campus road run. coach's test
and testsssss. fuk.

ouh well.
ill write it here in malay.
cux not many will understand. haa
hmm.

aku terbayangkan wajahmu selalu.
sudikah kamu.
oh wahai yang indah. yang dikatakan awesome!.
belum sempat aku bersemuka and berbual dengan mu.
bilakah ya?...

anyways.
why would anyone not write their name in my tagboard.
there must be a reason. oh well.
peace.

2008-11-17T09:45:00.002+08:00

tats.my new shoe!

darn. woke up in the mornin ...
felt the dizziness. im still sick...
when is it gonna end... omg.
fukin frustratin.

ouh darn. ica's later! study study!
and should i train today?.
i should ryte? could release some heat..
hmm...

i have no much time am i?
or i have much time...
i need my pay.
i need money.
oo honey!.
faster.
payday.

2008-11-16T23:46:00.002+08:00

darn. weekend gonna end soon!.
ouh well, its gonna be another crazy week coming.

ouh by e way. ive got myself a new pair of shoes.
adidas porche design series 2! haa. yeap! got it on saturday.

been studyin whole day and the best thing is whenever i tried to recall
somethin. nothing recalled. die!.

ive got two test tomorrow! ooooh nooo!.

law and ict.
law - studied.
ict - what is ict?. get it!

im tireddd.
very.

someone. somebody save me...
- just like smallville. haa.
siao.

2008-11-14T18:45:00.002+08:00

i tink i shud shut down my blog.
no i shud not. yes i shud.
okay heres the thing. its kinda dead.
tagboard's dead...oo darn bored.

well i gonna still use it like a journal.
good things are meant to be shared.
happiness revolves around the ppl u noe.

hmm. im still kinda sick.
still feeling the cold.
its a flu. and it refuses to go away.
oh well. im still stuck at home.

gonna strt studying my efma and law ica's.
and also the project of ict. which i haven even
buy the book yet.
cool luh...
well. gonna start soon!

erm.
im glad to accompany u all nite.
as i know. good things in life are hard to find.
well till then. looking forward for the next day..

2008-11-13T17:43:00.002+08:00

darn, that headache and dizziness is still there...
slept darn early yesterday cux mum complaints of my health..
a total of 15 hours of sleep.

went to the doctor, so i got flu and some throat problems.
but no fever yet. but im feeling darn cold la. these few days...
hasn't had enough rest. could be due to mental stress. but oh while..
its just a doctor predictions. cux i asked him...

hmm. so what got me sick. the last time i was sicked is like during tep.epm times
when ive got throat infection. so now im finally sick. ooh great.
yesterday coach test is a bitch. its raining heavily and of course. muscles are darn cold. so we kinda try to make our muscles heat up for hurdles and sprint test.
stuupid photoshoot. can't i have some time to concentrate...

worse aft everything. had a 6km run indoor...and then. wait for the rest outside clubroom. hmm. thats wen i start sneezing. okay. its time. its time that im sick. wth.

2008-11-12T00:36:00.000+08:00

i love that song.
darn.
why naz why?.

2008-11-11T09:13:00.002+08:00

monday has been alright...
i guess so...
hmm, went to sch earlier to study finance with my classmates.
had a boring marketing and law lecture...
and then ict test. in which i didnt study but past. wth.
haa.

than...kinda chill my way in library and saw yen lee.lols.
then its training. monday is self training day.
and darn, me and akid 4get to do cores, and we just jump to the pool.
darn stuuupid....

malik taught me about training my starts and pwers. i dun have much fast
twitch muscle. haha. dinner at long john at amk.
bad bad service i tell u. real bad. poor si hao gotta wait long for his food.
wad de. then off to home...read some finance...cannot absorb...
so what?.
i don't care.
i just went to slp...
cant take it...
too tired.

well. here i am. gonna strt studyin my finance.
marketing is all done. left to chck.
next week coming more ica. crazy la.

wth, whre's my money??!!!
im left with like 40 dollars?.
wtf.
cannot la...

she's awefully awesome,nice and kind.
end.

2008-11-09T03:18:00.003+08:00

well, i must try to sleep soon.
i just cant sleep. thinking of tomorrow...
the day after that and so on...

more ica are coming. and projects hand up...
must really ready myself...

i didnt attend training on friday...sorry sihao!.
he was left alone doing 400x5. there's no off season...
coach said that we are going pre season so there will be no
break...again, we gonna work our guts off...

i don't know why...
have you ever felt that you really want to know this person so much...
but worst is, you don't even know her. and only had one hi and one conversation...
it seems optimistic. this person, i saw her alot of times...
so kinda like see see look look...
and currently...im having problems like khalis.
somehow. we had hallucinations.

im hopefull that i can get to know her better.
something is different about her...
well, that if she allows me too...
can't be too direct can i. becuz im not that so.
she's my eye candy and ive just know her...
so whats next?. depends on me.
she's like a star.
simple.

2008-11-06T08:08:00.001+08:00

okay im announcing something...
today!. is the best father birthday!
my dad's birthday!. my one and only best daddy.
i love you dad.

-i didnt expect that i actually did that.
omg.and im still very hopefull.

2008-11-03T22:58:00.002+08:00

and i didnt expect it to happen.
and i finally said HI!.
its been awhile since i felt it...

im happy.
very happy...

2008-11-02T01:04:00.002+08:00

School has been alright...
while everyone has been busy with their own lifes...
me myself on the other hand keep pouring myself with new targets
for the new semester...yes, its already the third week of semesters...

new targets is rather not too high and not too low. reason was balance...
there will be no competition!. first priority that is!.
what matters is im a happy person and soo too everyone around me...

IPP, i felt that i should go overseas if i have the chance. Same old reason and that is experience that counts in the working industry...

off season has kinda starts off. im thinking of having a break of 2 weeks. first week has passed so im left with another week. gosh, i must be able to cut down my 400m timings. i have to try get to 52 plus by next year ivp. coach guidance will be soo in need...

there are soo much things too look into my life. that much for me though i still need to be patient about certain things. it is hard but one thing for sure. it is really all up to me. and erm....of course ive got be able to take care of myself before i can take care of that special person. hmm. keep guessing then. =).

anyways....a friend of mine sent me this horoscope files about personality check. and my god, it is soo true...for me though, hmm...
still, i can't trust too much on horoscope. reason is muslim laws!=).

ARIES MAN

He always let other people walk in front of him, but he will get there
first. He is a very careful guy and small obstacles won't make him
fall
easily even he thinks life is a very serious matter. He is as romantic
as
any other Zodiac. He could look gentle, but inside he is as strong as
steel.
Once he determine to do something, he is serious about doing it well.
He
will keep any pressure or insult deep down inside without showing
emotion.
You will never see his emotion of burden or disappointment and always
wonder
what he thinks or feels. He will well kept his feeling.

You will never see a guy in this Zodiac involving in other people
business.
He always concern with his own business. Sometimes he can be
talkative, but
he will never give anyone advice if he has not been asked. If you ask
for
advice, he will certainly give you one. He respects elderly and
senior, so
you will see he is the type who visit his parents steadily or often.

He is a slightly shy but also a stubborn person. He will find many
ways to
make you happy when you are with him, till you realize he is the
important
person for you. Once he is in the "Power Position", he will use his
power
gently. He is a good leader and "Gentleness" is one of his effective
method
for exploiting his power. It is although he is borne to be a leader.
He
never hide his ambition, and he is a workaholic. he will not take any
position that he has no control. He will work very hard to reach his
goal
and satisfaction.

Compliment from his boss or superior are never enough for him, he want
his
deserved reward. His deep insecurity make him reach and collecting
valuable
things, and this you may think he is stingy. Actually he could easily
spending money to buy things, traveling or pay for things that makes
him
happy and he think necessary for his need. He care what other people
think
of him and want to get good comments or compliments.

Outside he looks like stone and steel, but inside he is a fragile
person.
He
will hide and cover up weak emotion and his sadness in order to
maintain
and
keep up his "Image". One method of cover up you could easily notice is
suddenly if he is quiet, cold, or act very strong or very secure.
Often, he
feels insecure, even he is serious about his life and his own
surrounding.

This is the man who never hurry to get marry, so hardly sit back and
regret
about his marriage later. If he gets marry, he need to be very certain
and
very sure. It will take a long time for such decision, so if you tell
him
that you are "breaking up" , you better forget him for good because he
will
never coming back.

He always keep his promise. If he said he will meet you in your place
in 2
hours then he will be there, unless there is a serious accident or
unavoidable things happen. He hate people who is late for date or any
appointment.

He like to think woman should be a follower and take care of family
and
working is a man duty. He does not like to compete with his girl
friend or
his wife at work because competition already exist with himself and
other
people. He will be very proud if he can afford and care for his
family. Do
not try to over power him or insult him, he can not stand it. He likes
to
be
in control of every things, every situations.

He like a "Classy Woman" ,if she also comes from a good family then it
is a
Plus. It will make him feel proud and very ego about her status.
Flashy
type
of woman , forget it. He like a perfect or a nearly perfect housewife.
He
tend to be possessive. He will not tell you if he is mad at you, but
will
act very moody to show you instead.

He like to hear sweet word and compliment so you can get his interest
that
way. If he approaches you to ask you out, do not act too stubborn or
fooling
around too much. He will get tired and just disappear. He has to feel
confident when he is around you, so knowing this fact you should know
what
to do, right!

If you want him, you have to make him feel like he is the most
important
person for you. He likes a kind hearted woman , polite and can get
along
with his family. When he feels sad, do not leave him alone, but be
very
supportive. Kind words and your smile will win him over, so this
strong man
will be like a chicken in your palm.

2008-10-27T18:35:00.001+08:00

my current favourite music videos!
=)

2008-10-27T18:03:00.002+08:00

i would like to thank my one and only NYP track team for all the hardwork they have put in for this competition. i see dissapointment faces all over when we got 2nd for poly!. its okay people. NEXT YEAR!. top poly!!!! we can do it!.

we improve soo much. next year will be our year. malik and i are going to try for the nationals! big dreams comes from big heart. and im sure we can definately do it...

hmm what else.
yesterday. went out shopping with sec friends...
i saw this white shoes!!! i want!. i saw this grey shirt i want!.
i saw this black shoe.
this brown bag.
this blue bag.
omg!!!..

money ooh money!>..where's my honey!

2008-10-21T23:31:00.000+08:00

finalli im back home.
i felt that home is still the greatest place of all.
today is not bad....ive been doing my tutorial...
except for subjects like business finance and essencial of sports and wellness.
hmm..
weird things start to happen again...

its the fifth time i saw this girl in the mrt, and worse, it is all
at a different timing and different cabin. she is a JC student. hmm....can see by the uniform, i won't say which jc.. and she is a little close to my height. rather good looking and fair look. for about 6 times, we saw eachother. so i kinda like try to not to think too much about it until today...

the fourth time i saw her. i kinda smile to myself. but but!. she thought i smile to her so she smile back. darn. that was my fault maybe. lols. but just now!. its like wth la. hmm. okay... i enter the train at about 10pm, aft dinner with track teamates...and then i kinda have to stand till around yishun. when standing i realise the girl behind me look familiar la...

and so, yishun it is. there were 2 empty seats at the side. so of course i have to sit right?. so i sit. but then. she also sits with me. okay. now im beginning to feel weird. darn. so i pretend that i don't care...by trying not to look towards her direction.

and the weirdest thing that happen is. whenever i look at the reflection opposite me, she too look at it...and and! everytime it happen we try to look different direction, in malay is "malu malu". so. im begining to felt very uncomfortable...
i keep trying to have a glace at the reflection to see what she is doing...

for some reasons, she have this dissapointment look. i saw it at the reflection. and she began to rest her head back and look directly at me... so i was darn nervous. by then it is at woodland...should i say hi? or even intro?....but i just can't do it. im just so freaking shy...so i try to turn to look at her just once!. just once huh!. wahs!. shit. abt 4 secs we stared at eachother. i turn to look forward...darn. she's really looking at me. deep down inside me i want to know who is she...why do we always cross path at eachother...

by then the train reaches marsilling...so she just stand and gave me a smile...darn!.i smile back of course...then then!. FOR some stupid unvoluntary actions of mine. i wave bye to her and say see you! wtf wtf!!!!
how in the hell did i did that?!. im freaked out of myself...after she left. whoa....everything seems to tone down real alot...so much better.

who is she???...
who?!!!!!
i wanna know her name...
very sweet looking malay girl...

and the worst thing is. while siting with her...
she changed her ipod song to One step at a time by Jordin sparks.
and u know wad...im listening to that song...

this is by far, one of the weirdest day in my life...

2008-10-20T23:32:00.003+08:00

THE PLAN: WACK 150M, 50M RELAX, INCREASE SPEED 100M, CRUISE 100M. WHAT I DID?: WACK 150M, 50M RELAX, INCREASE SPEED 50M, dying 150M. so is that cool or what. gotta train those last part. speed endurance that is. ive got 2 national runners aftering me frm behind. its feaking scary damnit. and i can only get better.hmm....

2008-10-18T23:38:00.003+08:00

and, FINALLI!.

i can on my laptop.
was so damn busy these few days..
and and!, my laptop abit problematic luh!.

ill be uploading some video for the next post.
the video showcases my run in ivp!. 400m heats.

hmm, ive lost that run, but wth, ive improve alot!.
compared to last year, that speed, has certainly put me in great standard,.
im only 19 and of course im getting better.
im already looking forward for next yr IVP.

im so proud of the team!.
well its all about next week!. we will beat the rest of the poly!.
we can do it!.

first week of sch is not bad. but im sure it'll be better as week goes by.
on btw, i cut my hair twice in one week
crazy i noe!> i just dun feel right!.

still looking 4ward for certain things.
will be updating soon!.
2molo is hari raya outing!.

2008-10-08T02:02:00.001+08:00

was listening to this song. somehow i think its nice.
and its my ringtone song now. lols.
and found its translation.
no language barrier it is.

對這個世界如果你有太多的抱怨
dui zhe ge shi jie ru guo ni you tai duo de bao yuan
If you have too many grievances towards this world,

跌倒了就不敢繼續往前走
die dao le jiu bu gan ji xu wang qian zou
Having fallen, you lose the courage to go on

為什麼人要這麼的脆弱墮落
wei shen me ren yao zhe me de cui ruo duo luo
Why do people want to be so weak and fallen?

請你打開電視看看
qing ni da kai dian shi kan kan
Please turn on the television now and see for yourself

多少人為生命在努力勇敢的走下去
duo shao ren wei sheng ming zai nu li yong gan de zou xia qu
So many people bravely fighting for their lives

我們是不是該知足
wo men shi bu shi gai zhi zu
Shouldn't we be content,

珍惜一切　就算沒有擁有
zhen xi yi qie jiu suan mei you yong you
Cherish all we have, even if we don't possess them

＊還記得你說家是唯一的城堡　
hai ji de ni shuo jia shi wei yi de cheng bao
I still remember you said home is your only castle

　隨著稻香河流繼續奔跑
sui zhe dao xiang he liu ji xu ben pao
Following the paddy fragrance, the flowing stream, I continued running

　微微笑　小時候的夢我知道
wei wei xiao xiao shi hou de meng wo zhi dao
Smile, I know the childhood dreams

　不要哭讓螢火蟲帶著你逃跑　
bu yao ku rang ying huo chong dai zhe ni tao pao
Don't cry, let the fireflies take you away, escaping

　鄉間的歌謠永遠的依靠
xiang jian de ge yao yong yuan de yi kao
You will always find serenity in folk songs

　回家吧　回到最初的美好＊
hui jia ba hui dao zui chu de mei hao
Go home, return to the sweet past

不要這麼容易就想放棄　就像我說的
bu yao zhe me rong yi jiu xiang fang qi jiu xiang wo shuo de
Don't give up so easily, just like what I said,

追不到的夢想　換個夢不就得了
zhui bu dao de meng xiang huan ge meng bu jiu de liao
If the dream can't be reached, then just follow another dream

為自己的人生鮮艷上色　
wei zi ji de ren sheng xian yan shang se
Add bright colours to your own life

先把愛塗上喜歡的顏色
xian ba ai tu shang xi huan de yan se
Paint LOVE in your favourite colour

笑一個吧　功成名就不是目的
xiao yi ge ba gong cheng ming jiu bu shi mu di
Smile, fame and success isn't the aim

讓自己快樂快樂這才叫做意義
rang zi ji kuai le kuai le zhe cai jiao zuo yi yi
Be happy. That is the whole meaning

@ 童年的紙飛機　現在終於飛回我手裡
tong niang de zhi fei ji xian zai zhong yu fei hui wo shou li
(Just like how) I finally found my lost childhood innocence

＃所謂的那快樂　赤腳在田裡追蜻蜓追到累了
suo wei de na kuai le chi jiao zai tian li zhui qing ting zhui dao lei le
What is happiness? It's chasing dragonflies in the fields barefooted till we're exhausted

　偷摘水果被蜜蜂給叮到怕了　誰在偷笑呢
tou zhai shui guo bei mi feng gei ding dao pa le shui zai tou xiao ne
Tried to steal fruits but suffered so much beestungs until i am scared. Who's snickering (at me)?

　我靠著稻草人吹著風唱著歌睡著了
wo kao zhe dao cao ren chui zhe feng chang zhe ge shui zhao le
Leaning against the scarecrow, enjoying the wind, singing songs till I fall asleep

　哦　哦　午後吉他在蟲鳴中更清脆
o o wu hou ji ta zai chong ming zhong geng qing cui
Oh~ Oh~ In the afternoon, the guitar chords sound more crisp amidst the cries of the insects

　哦　哦　陽光灑在路上就不怕心碎
o o yang guang sa zai lu shang jiu bu pa xin sui
Oh~ Oh~ The sunlight shines on the road so there's no need to fear a heartbreak

　珍惜一切　就算沒有擁有＃
zhen xi yi qie jiu suan mei you yong you
Cherish everything, even if we don't possess them

- credits : jaychou.net

2008-10-05T02:50:00.004+08:00

. . . .. .. . ..... .......
checking system...okay its fine!. haha.
s-hole.
wtf, stupid lappy. anyway. hari raya oi!.
first of all. to all my muslims friends out there.
Selamet Hari Ayer oi!ayer ayer ayer.
haa. do forgive me for any sins that i could have cause ppl.
i love my friends!

first day is visit grandma and cousins!
i have the best grandma in the world, why?. cuz we love eachother.
she's my real girlfriend. my mum and dad is the best in the world.
basically best family la.wth. haha.
had a crazy time visiting other cousins.
photos below is thanks too cousin, sis suhailah!. ah take a look

one big BIG family.=D

ONE QUARTER OF THE GUYS IN THE COUSINS!. AND ITS ONLY ONE QUARTER.

DARN, MY EYES LOOK SO TIRED, MY SMALLER BRUDER, ASHARI AND ZAKI

MY BELOVED SIS, SUHARTI & SUHANA

ladies just being ladies.

WHOA, had a real nice times. then ryte...aft those nice times...fri i went for training....duh!.
u noe how lazy i am?!. wth.

anyway...
i must admit, when i first time saw this girl...
i was like...damn, who is she... Nope...and no chance in hell to know her!...she's no
any ordinary typical malay girls. she seriously look like half malay and chinese...
and i turned and i look...and i said to my brudders. nahs...im not into relationship...well, they know, im crapping. haha. but then...
imagine seeing someone whom you have been waiting to see...
she's my eye candy de.
she's all what i defined as my very own eye candy...
well, like i said its eye candy.... when was the last time i had my eye candy?!.
its during the ogl times. she's a godd friend of mine now. anw. back to e topic....
this time, im really melted...my knees go weak when i sees her..wah!...what should i do when i see her...she asked to say hi...and and....im not too sure about it. damn!.
when can i see her again?...
well, ihate facing this reality.
reality check! sooner or later i just have to do it...

hmm, simplest to say..ive been thinking.
this blog title is Poetry in Motion.
so shud add poem rytes..
well, here it goes. just for u.

You are everything that I have been looking for
Enough to distract me from what is not meant be
You keep me focused on what is real
And for this I must tell you how I feel

I wish for your talks, all through the day
I never want you to walk away
I want us to be together, even if it’s not forever
Being together for a period of time is better than never being together

I want us to know each other
Inside and out, this is what my heart desires
Tell me how you feel
And tell me all of your fears

I want us to have a trust like no other
The kind where we can tell one another whatever
I want us to have a bond
That no one in this world can break

Don’t tell me this is impossible
That everything I want can never happen
Girl, give it a chance and see what can truly happen
Just realize that we can be so happy

I want you
In short that is all I want
I understand what all of that means and girl
You’re worth it to me

I want to see you day and night
No matter the weather
It’s not going to be possible I never said it would
But it could be the best thing that could happen to me for the least

Let’s runaway together
That’s what I truly desire
Just tell me your reason for existance
We could have the same purpose, you and I

So come away with me
Let our hearts have what it is they desire
Relax and let our life happen
Don’t give up on us before we begin

If we can overcome all of this
Then our minds, bodies, and souls will have what they want in the end
Isn’t that what truly matters
It’s us together that I desire

naz.
edited vocab by sis and bro.haha. i got b4 for Ingalish eh.

2008-09-30T01:36:00.003+08:00

okay here's the thing.
my laptop internet crashes.
starts to send spams and emails...
got 124 trojans. 2 worms, 2 viruses.
and boom. there goes everything.

i manage to recover everything within 12 hours.
and now, its internet speed are darn slow.and it restart
because of certain loss and deletion of registry values.
darns.

okay. hmm
today is okay la. why.
attended training, and this time.
my knee really hurts. its so freakingly uncomfortable
and i felt sudden twitches while running. thats really bad.
hopefully it recovers by nxt week.

hari raya is coming!> got a lil excited for some reasons.
this time, im looking forward for the foods!. haha...
not looking forward for forgiving. lols. wth.

was watching BIG STAN movie.
its darn nice!!!.
haha gay prison who encouraged raping.
lols..

hmm what else.

my defination of my eye candy will be in the next post.
cuz ive finally found her.
haha. akid knows..

2008-09-28T02:04:00.002+08:00

sometimes it makes you wonder.
people say certain things, and it backfire them.
and it ends up with them not being happy and uncertain.
but then. isn't that what they said and wanted to have...

to treat and make things happen truthfully and wholeheartedly
is always a great wish for anyone tat makes any decision.
they believe. they wanted truth...and yet they believe in faith.
so if its faith, why not let certain thing happen its way and not
their way?. contradictory. at least for me.

hardwork does not mean deserving. while certain things can be done
better, it is all in the mind. your williness to do it?...to let
it happen. like it once happened, if ur unwilling, sure too
will that heart of yours.

so is it still the right path? the right track after those decisions.
ask yourself this... where did the others go?. where are the rest now?
who are you to them?.certain things can never be perfect. to have it perfect
means expectations, and from there so too dissapointment.

while i have to let it go, ive tell myself, no matter what. i shall not be selfish.
there's selfish people out there that i knew, whom rather chase their dreams
and only could settle down with a quote" when u gain something, you'll lose something". thats to them so its their lost. life is too short to just not
cherish and give. ur achievement won't bring you to death.

why limit yourself, when you are the same as other human on earth.. there
are no limits of what you can do. really.should never admire other personality
but always look at yourself. it what you can do to change that matters.

simplest to say. decision made by yourself can never be assured unless its proven.
no matter what you've said...and decide. what has happened has certainly made you regret. well, selfishness in humans is their greatest downfall.

tat just my thoughts of the day. while reading certain books.
looking through blogs,journals and feedbacks...
ive certainly learnt something today.

that has been pretty much what those close to me were.
sorry to say but its true.

2008-09-27T03:12:00.002+08:00

here it goes...
yay-ness. finally!. the semester end.
our first and only semester.
went through alot with my classmates.
somehow, we create enemies. but lets just forget them
we forge memories ya!. haha.cool.

erm like...
eh bro?!.hows life da.
haha.lols.

now begins our 2 weeks break...
got real difficulties thinking what the hell.
am i gonna do... hmm.
the theme of this 2 weeks.
n.a.z.

n = Natural
A = Amicable
z = Zany

i don't know what the hell and
how the hell?!. i thought about tat.
was toking to a fren, and it just came out.
cool.
kinda figure out. 2 weeks. while training
and preparing for Ivp and also hari raya...
its a must must that i indulge myself to my
wild fantasies.

its gonna be different.
not any more normal outings.
something creative and unpredictable...
yea. like my frens hu usually describe me as
unpredictable.

haa!. cool luh.
anyway. about today.
had training...
and..
i injured my knee.
it hurts real bad.
cant walk properly.
walk like an old man.
darn.
sad can.
must recover real soon...
im scared of hurdles.
i hate jumping.

its like 3 plus...AM.
and i cant sleep.wah lao.
still. been reading lots of articles over the net.
some interesting facts...
well, knowledge is god.

random, im still waiting for
photos from anuja. she's slow!.
as in everything.yeap.

2008-09-21T23:46:00.003+08:00

update ler!!.
why so lazy.
the previous posts is a little bit overboard.
haa. sorry guys. to those who's reading it.
i kinda had no one to turn to. so? vent out my anger here.
anyway, let's just forget about it okay...

im so happy with my progress!!!. my sports, my health
and my relationship with my friends. been improving.
ive always tell myself, no enemies for me. no more.
be carefree, and appreciate others is what matters.

hari raya is coming. i've cleaned up my room!. haha.
actually got 2 rooms for me. so tis time. i really
did myself a good job.

and. sch new semester starts on nxt 3 wks. and ive yet to go shopping?!.
shopping as in, this time, i really am gonna buy something. swear to god!. i will buy!.and buy and buy. so who's gonna shop with me? alone? shud be...

a change of taste!!. and also. a new hairstyle!. soon!. ive kept this hair for damn too long. can't wait. to finally cut it.. look at the pic above. 80s medium. no need fancy korean hairstyle.

a grp of frens are going KL. im not going....but i expect each of u 6 ppl to get me something huh?!. wah lao.

a teamate of mine suddenly msg me. to take his place for ivp. i cant be bothered abt him. cuz, it always happen. and he's just having problems. hopefully he got time to think abt it. cuz im not gonna do it. simple as that.

2008-09-19T00:01:00.002+08:00

who the fuck care about it.
you're typical. oh yes you are.
you're pathetic, why the hell are you repeating
the same thing again and again. isn't it obvious
that you're uncertain. a big mistake it is.
its a great loss. i can't help. don't expect me to.
don't expect me being nice. im not a tool to make you
feel better. yes, i rather not be in your life.
it's all not worth it. always blinded by yourself and that is
your very own stupid excuses to make yourself get better comments.
fuck off, you doubt yourself, no one will help you.
you're just going through the motion of your life.
life is not easy damn it. you're no bitch. you're nothing.
fuck you.

just keep on doubting of your decisions ya?!. we'll see where
you'll go. i've told ya'.im not interested with your yank.

don't waste my time.

2008-09-18T00:20:00.002+08:00

update's now.
time trial. did a real bad timing. for 800m.
really bad. coach was right. what the hell are u following them for?
ur faster than that. hmm. a real lesson. 400m sprint. did a 55sec sprint.
did not manage to get my pb which is 54 sec. still. far from kumar's 49sec
haha.

whatever la, haa. sunday we celebrate yen le's birthday. happy birthday to YENLE!. haha.

and also, yesterday, i mean tuesday, we celebrated our bro Hafiz birthday and charlene birthday!. haa real fun indeed!. i miss those melted cheese!!. hehe.
i ate alot. pizza, ben and jerry and then fast food,cakes. wah. anyway. hopefully they 2 are happy with the celebration. for hafiz, he's gonna leave us for NS. and for charlene, we made it earlier cuz we got training today!. Happy birthday u 2!!. woo hoo.

pictures below.

2008-09-14T22:53:00.002+08:00

am i ready?. am i not?.
how how?!.
im begining to panic. rabak siol...

coach anounced that there will be time trial tomorrow.
the better timing ones will be selected to race for IVP.
representing NYP. darn. i remember those days, when we all
worked out ass off just to get into the main eleven for
our soccer team. that feeling is so freaky!

im not sure if im ready?!this kind of feelings always happens.
can i still run my best while fasting. coach says that my run will be
800m and 400m sprint...
i know its a chance to prove myself. yet again. i doubt that im ready.
i'll run my own race tomorrow. and i shall tell myself,that challlenger is my ownself.
my one and only self.
argh!!!!

hmm what else, there's a change in style for me!.
some style it is. those who knows me well will know.

life is getting interesting.

2008-09-11T05:51:00.004+08:00

time to update!
a few hours time, is our cs presentation.
darn. im not ready to act.
cuz i can't act.

fasting month has been great.
been training hard. till my tongues are dried,
my mouth...almost merlioned. but then, can control...
only terawih once. good boy huh!.
and and, been skipping prayers.
omg.

i once thought of quitting track.
throw away those thoughts now!
dammit!. ivp is coming up in a few weeks time.
damn! afraid no failure.afraid no one.
im nazri, im different. i race to win. not to
just try my best.

top priority. get a medal.
easy? we'll see.

i managed to get a new pair of running shoes.
its the adizero cs.tis one below.
a new training and competition shoe.

next target is this spikes mid dist.gonna have it soon. overseas order.

2 weeks of break is coming so so soon...
cant wait.to shop and shop and train and train and also
catch up witht the rest!
cant wait!

i love adidas. and i hate nike. as simple as that.

2008-09-01T23:28:00.002+08:00

its never easy to understand.
while others say it is easy to forget,
i don't.

Real loss only occurs when you lose something
that you love more than yourself.

and it will soo much a great deal in this world
if i tell you. like always, im still stuck with my past.
ive done it before, everything that you could have imagine.
ive been there. and i keep telling myself. i just got to move on...

Remember me when you are gone, far to the beyond, away from me. A journey I cannot go with you on, even though you are going for good. I have tried for tears not to fall from my eyes. Keep alive the beautiful times we share, and take it to heart that my love for you is ever sure. Remember me. Oh, remember me, for memory may fade but they never die...

ive tell myself...

The worst pain in the world is knowing that she meant everything to you but you meant nothing to her.

But, life goes on once you realize your own strength inside of you:
the strength to realize that saying goodbye doesn't mean that you don't love the person anymore or that you don't want to keep them in your life.

It doesn't mean you're weak. It means that you've the strength to let go and live your life to the fullest because you've learned that life really is good.
You are strong and can only be as happy as you choose

i hope it stays that way. because i knew i don't deserve this.
life is never fair.
always being taken advantage.
call her bitch? i cant. cuz it will hurt more.
let fate decides.

imsick.
imtired.
ineedabreak.

2008-08-31T00:16:00.004+08:00

Finally! and finally
a better blogskin.

thanks to hafiz track for the help!.
cool!. credits to him...

anyway, im sick now...
didnt go training on friday and saturday.
darn...worse. monday is family dinner for 1st day of fasting.
skip training again!....wth la.
refered to hospital for checkup.
pls pls this time recover...

anyways.

ming guang has left for China for attachment.
although it will be like 6-7 weeks.
im gonna miss him. take care bro.
bon voyage. and all the best there.
come back soon!.

im begining to be pessimistic.
well, for some reasons though.
i can never repay my parents for what they did to me.
it will never be enough.
i will work hard.

my chinese uncle just passed away, died when he was sleeping.
darn. i miss him already. he has always been supportive of me.
i must cherish my parents. after looking at my cousins grieveness.
i must tell myself, it is never too late to turn back.

2008-08-27T02:05:00.002+08:00

haha.dumb be. still thinkin about stylish iphones..
ive made another decision...well,i just cant seem to stick to one.
lols.
anyway. not buying iphone, lots of comments in the net and reviews.
sooo.
whats next?.
sony ericsson C905?. yeap. i like that!.
i want. hehe. october....luh!!

training is getting toucher.
almost merlioned on monday....
speed traning was crazy. but
there's a big difference in the technique used.
and come to think of it. i improved. i felt it.
really!...can what coach taught me is darn usefull.

coach is teaching us how to do weights tomorrow.
and damn it. wen the seniors heard that? they were like wth?.
cuz he nvr teaches them those.

gettin busier and busier again.

2008-08-25T00:24:00.003+08:00

mum was funny.
was watching victoria secret runway show just know
with her. i kinda suggested, that im getting a wife like them...
and she said, oh come on, those kinds....impossible. dream on.
and i replied. thats why i dreamed. u ask me to.

eh why not, they're hot luh!. haha. while watching with mum, i kinda
make some remarks. that one is my fav and that one is my 2nd fav. and then dad
reminded me. only 4 ar!!!. i was like wad?. u can only marry four. tat was like wth la.
dad encouraged me to marry 4. wth la. haha.

2molo. classical starts....alamak. lazy la. haha. 3 hrs a day in sch. sounds sooo stupid. haha.

hmm, it has been raining for couple of days. darn. soo cold la...guess what now? im addicted to games. and coach just msg. training starts 4 days a week under coach for ivp buildup. whoa cool la.

shhh....need time to regenerate.

2008-08-20T22:07:00.002+08:00

with all do respect,
i enjoyed today.for some reason. =)
guess the holydeys are worthwhile...

anyways,
i pray hard for a friend.
hoping that fucker leaves her.
some guys are useless and just plain hopeless.
nothing to do in thier life. no reasons.
no meanings and no aims. stalkers losers and heartbreakers.
is that how you painted your life.
bloody hell!.

2008-08-19T10:58:00.002+08:00

okay. now im f-ing bored at home.
i hate watching movies. i hate wathching news and reading books.
i need to chill out with my friends. where are they?!...
steffi and ming guang is going china soon. and damn! they are busy with exams.
in fact, most of them are having exams.,,

birthdays are coming soon. this time is something d.i,y again. thats has been what im doing. gotta think of something. whatever it is!. im sure it'll be better for me to do it so nie that it'll dunk my past. what a stupid effort in the past. nothing gain. freak!.

fasting month is coming soon, and ivp is coming. i dun wan to fast! wahs. sian and training is getting harder at times. peak performance and free from injuries. i need to get a new running spikes. i want that adidas adistar md or adidas beijing md. but how tell me!?!.

one week. for me to get a good nice life. gotta think of something. realli. i shud not be sitting at home. but shud realli enjoy. darn!. i have to. i must.

im not proud of the olympic singapore silver medal. not going to be. a few reasons.

2008-08-17T13:05:00.001+08:00

2008-08-12T22:49:00.002+08:00

im kinda a little excited about
the upcoming barclays premier league! this sunday! woot!.
im supporting my favourite team, MANCHESTER UNITED!.

chelsea,arsenal,liverpool and totenham are tough competitors. its
gonna be one hell of a season!. yeap.

monday, had some little cardiovascular!. ytd. hmm. played soccer at the school field.
darn! my old skill is still there!> not that rusty though. i can shoot the ball with the power!. haha. afterall, in secondary school, i was known for being able to shoot the ball like carlos!> cool. akid was the keeper and hafiz nok is my striking partner.

speaking about hafiz nok, that brother of mine. he is the official no nok from now on!. haha. he replaces me!. a. no. he is the one. not me!. he is the king of girls. everywhere he go. girls flocks around him. haha!. he even admitted himself," im the kind of girls!"- whatever lar bro!. u happy can already....

well how about me?!. no way. i never want to be king or whatever!. im still wondering why guys likes girls surrounding them?!. don't wanna be that famous. maybe a little moderate?!. rather be low profile. better. because if i reveil too much, than most will probably know what i am and there will be no wonderful surprises.

hmm, getting a girlfriend,my heart would say yes. but my actions will say no. after looking at some blogs. all they ever talk about is love and just love with their partners. some dying after break up, some crazy about their sunshine. gosh...all they think is love, relationship and thats all. isn't life more than that?.
i know, i too seek comfort and care. but then, ive got soo much to do too care about it. haa. getting the right one is never easy but most says as if its so easy and that its like child's play. like a toy to them. idiots. well, for my case, i can never get the right one. something bad is sure to happen. such a loser i am.
when will the right one comes?...hai. im sure to loose them again and again. sucks isn't.whateverlar. life is pretty much goes with the flow.

gosh ivp is coming. the pressure is up.

2008-08-11T00:41:00.004+08:00

last week is so called the end of body watch gym!. haa.
i kinda completed my reports early and to see everyone rushing is
soo weird cux im not doing anything!...great.

today is like sooo bored. so is yesterday. my sat and sun is boring cux i stay at home!!!. first time weekend i stayed home!> omg!.
haa.

fri was awesome. our class outings. seol garden at marina. crazy times we had there. i ate like crazy. but hu cares. i can nvr be fat becuz im not build to be fat and huge!. haha.
so we ate and ate...
and then went to starbucks!. haa. free drinks!. twice in a day. omg.

hmm....tis gonna be one hell of a slacking week. soooo soooo bored.
i want to go out!!!.
sian.
classical studies starts in 2 weeks time!...bore doom!.

not to forget fasting month...
why so soon?!.im nt ready!>

2008-08-04T22:36:00.002+08:00

photos is frm eleanor!
first and formost! happy birthday to my dear fren ELEARNOR! haha.
happy birthday da. haha. may ur wishes come true..
hmm. fri nite. wen shopping...i spent erm...quite alot...
and then find some presents for other peeps too. had a nice chilling time.

saturday was boring. reports and reports. and ive finally completed all my reports!.

sunday was shopping with hafiz,khalis and charlene!. haha. movies with hafiz and charlene. then peijun meet us. for ben and jerry! lols.
just to visit peng xin!. had a real great time.
but then...the day has to end...bored...

2008-08-02T22:02:00.002+08:00

2 weeks of break.
its really bad. that feeling is sooo sucky.
what would my other track teamate thinks?
im not lazy. no im not.
i've tell myself. i must this time really rest more
and get fit.

no real injuries in sec days...but in poly. its real bad. this must stop.

with ivp in mind. ive got this problem. that 8oom and 1500m spot.
is really not easy. in my school, we have phillip, marcus and jerome
who are really good in those events. i can't beat them with the training rate im doing now.its really bad.

those glory days in secondary school are all in the past. i have to forget about the past.

last friday, i did not went to training. and i actually looked at them training. with all those pains in their face. passionate they are in their sport. track and field is not what im passionate in. it is more of what i believe in.

this is not how im suppose to feel. this is not what ive been.
that feeling came back. and it is something so different that i didnt feel for so long. i even dreamt about it.

mr ramesh said to me," naz, you're a fighter and you can go far".

he is my coach. a national coach too. he trained me well and provide great guidance in life. he said to me about believing in myself and everything will be alright.

mr tim said to me, " naz, just take a look around, think and then strike him hard. aim his weakness points ", my tkd sir...

ive been missing this thing...and it is believing myself. ive lost it.
and this time. im forgetting about those glory days but now. it has to be me working hard in my training.

please. call me a loser.
call me useless, good for nothing.
or whatever you like.
i love it. becuz
it'll do me good.

a good way to believe myself and strike you in the weakness.
u shud never work behind close doors. but show it. show to them.
show that you can. show me you are my competitor. compete with me.
challenge me. hit me hard. and i'll show you what is hard.
humans did great things so why cant you.

tkd taught me dicipline and pain.
soccer taught me patience and balance.

believe.
just believe.

3 words.
determination, dicipline and believe.

it is back.
finally.
whoa im so glad it is.

wun be updating anytime soon.
naz.

2008-07-30T10:56:00.003+08:00

this is flyes!.not flying.with your hands.lols!.joke of the day
haha.

yesterday was like wow!.

i saw tan chor hoon flying!. haa.
wad the hell la.
gym visit presentation is finally over!.
and 56 exercises test with james wong is done!> a huge relief..
now left with mr james tan and mr damien lee.

hmm. about bowling on sat. we had stuupid names on the
screen.
nazri = nonok
malik = myleg
akid = hulk
sihao = lanchu. as in pikachu dick.
hafiz = hafiz.- shuld be gayboi.

and i keep insisting. my bros are all gayboys.
real gays. and what am i?. the nonok. darn stoopid...

malik taught sihao how to spell the work rock in malay
and that is supposely to be BATU. but what he said.
"SIHAO, SPELL IT THIS WAY. B-A-T-O-O. batoooooo!." darn idiotic la.
buly ppl.

akid thrash the hell out of me. and then what he says?. "true true!"
another nonsense.

im trying to disturb hafiz track about his new found girl. haha!> and he wants it
alone.!lols too bad. hehe.

to my classmates and everyone. how do you greet your friends?." EH BRO?! HOWS LIFE DA?". HAHA.

and if you were to go break?!.how?. "EH BRO?!. IM GOING NORTH? YOU WANT ANITIN?. IF NOT LATA I COME BACK WE TALK AGAIN. OKAY?" haha!

im going crazy with my classmate and teamates. darn!. nonsense comes from them!. not me.

another bro of ours, si hao.he and his darn lame jokes. wah i cannot tahan la.
but still, we all love him. after bulying abt his steamy hair.

im a good boi!. hehe.

i felt so relieve today that i decided to blog!> still i have my monthly gym usage report and also the pt 10 pages report. freak!. haha.weird.
im waiting for bw to end...im soo lazy...yes i am.
i cant wait to go out with the rest of my classmates...and friends..
i miss them ya. and a friend of mine is going china!...steffi!. miss ya girl.
and also. yunru going back to taiwan i guess. bye mum.
haidy. went back to turkey...
hmm....next week will be sb class outing to seol garden.i miss my class.
and i meant the 30 of them.

i wonder how issit gonna be when we are united next semester. chaos....darn chaos.
freak...

hmm.

im losing my interest in track...im loosing the passion. its still there. but i cant seem to get it back!. nooooooo!!!!. come back. oh come back. oh bring back my passion to me. to me!.
lols.

next week i shall start training back. haha. resting for 2 weeks. shin splint.
haha.

hmm. wad else to say...
okay this is kinda random..
knowing that someone is thinking about u...
how would u feel?..

hmm i dunno what to say...
people keep saying this and that and
i know being in the situation itself. i insisted.
that theres no such things that happen. its just fate.
well, ignorance...its just my way.

promises are promises...
to save someone. you gotta sacrifice yourself.
and sometimes...
it does hurt.
but then.
its all worth it.
and i meant it
till today...
im missing someone.
but i just cant show it.
cant be too obvious.

naz.

2008-07-28T01:35:00.002+08:00

okay im super duper uber tired now.
really am...

today, ive completed my
pfa report
executive summary report
personal selling report
gym visit powerpoint presentation.
and now im left
with PT report
and 56 exercises to complete.
what a productive day indeed...

kinda frustrated with the school works after one whole day
of doing report. shall try to chill. at most die together. as a group.
cant say much. gotta be understand.

friday was crazy. did not go training. played soccer. worst. and i tried running. bad. just bad. shin cannot make it. played soccer also like a fool.
was suppose to attend track dinner but then hafiz drag me to phat nite. haa.
went to phat nite with charlene, hafiz, peijun and peiyi. had real fun there.
but phat nite was not that nice as jam and hop.

had fun till arnd 10 plus. we left our bags outside the gym lockers and the gate is lock!. luckily hafiz went to the security guard main counter to help us. whoa...

sat. went out to town with hafiz and then meet the rest at east coast to play bowling. lols. had real fun. went to eat. then home...

darn i just too tired to elaborate further....anitin just ask me ppl...
fuck im too tired.

2008-07-24T21:23:00.002+08:00

hmm.i gotta improve on my time management!!!
darn.. i miss 2 napha tester liao. jia lat.
works are pilling up real crazy now!.

ive yet to start on my gym visit presentation?!.
damn!. ive completed my pfa report. and pt report just started!.
and personal selling have not even started.damn!.
lots of work. and sally are pushing me to allow her follow up my pt.
i cant say no based on her expression. idiot.
what an ass.

this weekend. is and only the decider for me. i must complete my personal selling report, my executive summary report, my 56 exercises, my personal training report and my gym visit presentation. NO MORE LAST MINUTE WORK!.

forget about personal problem. forget about those things. its makes you think. yes its true. but its all too late. you gotta wake up and not drag certain things that will slow you down. try to act normal. as per normal.

hmm. hard to handle. so handle with care. fragile.
i dunno why the hell im keep remembering this phrase.
stuuupid....noooob lar u.

anyway. gotta think positive. everything gonna be fine. train smart. rest enough. dun overstress. i dun compete with teamates but i compete with my expectations.

hmm. when was the last time i shop?...i want that armani belt, that perdro shoes, that topman shirts, that zara shirts, that guess jeans and that new hairdo.
darn!. $$$ money so honey eh?!...
damn!.

went to visit ms ratna yesterday!. whoa. her tummy so big. wish her all the best of health and that her gonna be a newborn child is health and handsome like me. easy ryte.

done! dah-habis.

2008-07-22T22:54:00.001+08:00

okays.recovery is on the way.
training hard in the gym.

werks are pilling up like crazy.
this is the time where true colours can be seen.
its a test.
a test of true characters.
come on naz.
you can do it!.

2008-07-20T12:38:00.003+08:00

this is naz hand language of FOCUS.
eh focus eh!. FOCUS!.

Im already counting the days of when body watch stopover gonna end
im so sick of school. i need'a holidays. a break. a good rest.
i gotta enjoy life!. i need to do lots of shopping. chlling out.
and of course need'2 start working.damn!

to be frank, imnot sure if im a good leader or not.im thinking that im not that good
to the team. im trying to make myself change to be a good leader. but seriously,im no no for it.

yesterday, alarm clock is at 5.30am. suppose to meet akid at 7.45 am at cck but in the end!, i woke up at 7.45am. ouh great. soo great. i wanna do some gymming in school but in the end gotta settle down to hydro training. Hydro training is real fun lar!. haha. coach was in good mood thats why. ouh, i kana forfeit!. hehe. and darn!. i forget how to say the national pledge!

anyway. again i felt the pain on the right shin!.shin splint. so fuckingly frustrating. coach scolded me. anyways. gotta ice almost like 3 times a day. just to recover quick. ive prepared myelf a weekly training schedule.

its a rather good training schedule. im sure about that. thanks to mr james wong resistance training notes. its time to bulk up!.

ehs guys!> focus focus!

2008-07-17T23:28:00.003+08:00

maybe im just being sensitive.
or getting the wrong information...

well.
i can never take any claims that our team has low in energy spirit.
damn it. look at that whp event. the moment i heard that i just flared up.
wtf. this team we are talking about is better than any other team of the previous
bw batch. i dare say so. why?. we don't just slack. we do work. we learn more thanks to sally and i can say that slacking is getting a no no in Bw gym anymore. we in this together.

anyway. its week 5 and works are pilling up real soon. gotta start on pt and pfa report. gonna finish those 54 exercises and gonna do some commercialise gym visit.
works are pilling up! damn!.

training was much better becuz i decided not to wear my spikes. hehe. normal training shoes will do. haa.
400m event?...i dun tink i can make it. but dare not say that. nvr try nvr knoe.

cardiocascular workout was fun. circuit training is getting better and so too those increasing resistance training.

lifes is just training and training.
damn...

gotta enjoy life abit ma.
ur not gonna earn alot in the future u noe!.

haha. getting a job real soon. but when!!!. i need money honey!

2008-07-15T07:31:00.002+08:00

an advice to a friend.
i may not know what is the real situation.
and i may not know what really happened.
all i can say it those problems you had
is all because of yourself. look at what you did
and think back. all these problems you face had now determines
what kind of person you are. be strong and decide quick.
decide on one. and resolve. everything will be fine. take care dear friend.

2008-07-13T00:43:00.002+08:00

okay firstly thanks to haslinda for this photo.
Osim trialthlon was a blast.
i meant among the organizers only la.
we won 3rd!. but not very satisfied.
we could have won 1st!.
its becuz phillip and danny was fast.
those partners of mine!. credits to them.

cycling was bad. the usual training i had was very good. and i did very badly
just now. i was slower like around 15 mins of what i supposed to get. very bad.
and it all thanks to my injured lower back. its real painful halfway through the 5km mark...and i keep pushing myself to the limits. till now, the back is darn paiful lar...to make things worse, im against the real cyclist and thier bike are damn powerful la. whereas mine is heavy and slow. Still, those bikes costs hundreds or even thousands.

on the good side, kinda train some milleage. i felt that my shin is getting better! yea!. so what does that mean?.
haa._

2008-07-10T23:00:00.002+08:00

now they called me brudder lurbe.
sounds damn wrong. and also wak nok?.
why?
cux i love coffee? and im a veteran in no-nok.
hmm. can i say alumni.
i tink i can change. eh no!. im no nonok in the first place?!.
its just rumours!

zhenguang taught me about scandalous today.
both of us is scandalous. but he's the scandal.
its him.

im in love with this song lyrics. why?!. i dunno!

Its a long way down
We so high off the ground
Sendin for an angel to bring me your heart
Girl where did you come from?
Got me so undone
Gazin in your eyes got me sayin

What a beautiful lady
No ifs ands or maybes
Im releasin my heart
And its feelin amazing
Theres no one else that matters
You love me
And I wont let you fall girl
Let you fall girl...

forever - chris brown.

songs by norwegian recycling are damn cool luh!.

had a nice chat with hazel and haslinda yesterday...
haa interesting people that never fails to make you smile...
yes i know...i just have gotta smile more often...
keeping quiet is emo shit.

had a crazy time finding a bicycle helmet! mass sms....damn...osim trialthlon is this saturday, the pressure is there...omg! help u brudder lurb here.

brudder naish has gone to NS. we are missing him. prayers go to him by the brudders of islam!. anyway, news keeps on coming...and im not too sure if everything is true. so i dun really care about it...

had gym session with kumar. darn. he's workout is crazy. so still wanna be in the national team?. tink again.

my shin ish recovering.... shud i join climb and run?
and darn. i joined osim wth.

hmm, sch work is sucky.
while people improves in the gym...
others are going down.
wth. all the blame is to we managers.
we tried harder and harder.
but what's the use. people judge only on something on
what they see.

sometimes, we gotta prioritize...
we have no clue if ur lying or not.
all i noe ur not our brudder anymore.
people hate things u do. as easy as that.
lying is bad. ur nose gets longer...
soo too ur sins and hatred.

im tired. ive just woke up from my afternoon nap...
its gonna be another long day tomorrow.
and hopefully it'll end as a chilling time for me
to prepare for the race on saturday.

ciaos ppl.

takcre.

2008-07-07T00:18:00.001+08:00

sat was sooooo fun!. had a real fun after a much stressful week.
okay here's the deal. lets just hope everythings gonna be find next week.
tis is me, am nazri. and have to be back to reality. im always picking up things.
and here i am. i can do it!> fer sure...
friends do lift me up. and i too won't be letting them down.

pray hard.

2008-07-04T23:10:00.003+08:00

another bad news..
my bro's has to pay that bills...

shall not tink about problems...
its bad...

really bad...

look into bright side.

2008-07-03T20:49:00.002+08:00

one of the worst day of my life.
full stop.

why cant u just understand. why cant u just tell me one simple
thing and stick to it. are u fucking stupid or what. i had enough today.
and i can do is just show that neutral face.

im frustrated. im very depressed and yet its good enough that i can show a good face the whole day. im trying not to mix my personal problems with work and things seems to get out of hand for me.

im fucking tired of the problems im facing. i had enough. what an ass. yesterday is my leg and now today is another thing. im quiet yes is true.

furthermore, i went for my checkup today and guess wad. the medical fees is $107, the highest in my life. and what else. no physical activities for one month. not frustrating enough? worse. u train hard u fall down harder. one problem after another and now is this. why cant it just recover. why issit still in me. can u just get out....doctor scolded me, and i may not even recover if not taken care of.
yesterday is shin and today is another. an old problem resurfaced.

who else can understand me, my parents? yes they do? but ive been spending my time in school so tell me now hu understand?. shit.

my hardwork is gone. and yes is gone. why? i won't tell anyone. i will not tell. im suffering everyday. why cant u people just understand. im eating myself up. im dying in my heart and thoughts.

im trying to look okay and my acting is failing as time goes by. physically and mentally im getting weaker. why cant i just go into coma...

im sick of this life. im sick of it. i tried to be satisfied of smallest thing and i tried to be happy but im no happy at all...

worse, the look of our instructor face today is so black. a hi and ignored.fed up.

chill ive been. trying to...

furthermore, im trying to help everyone, as much as i can. but i just can never do so...instead, im making others the victim of my own actions. im sorry . very sorry. but i can never utter a single word to u because im realli realli sad and i have no confidence to say so. hopefully u understand. it suppose to be yours. and i have no idea about it....

works ar pilling up soon. and where am i?
not gonna train for one week at least...a break i need.
u train hard ppl say u overtrain, u train smart ppl say ur unfit.
8&^&%^@$!

give me a million dollar and everything will be settled.
im tired....so so tired...
can i stand up again?

2008-07-03T01:01:00.003+08:00

today training is really really bad...
i only sprint 150m twice there goes my leg...
its a freaking shit feeling. hate it soo much...
consult marcus for help...was told to take a break and he said that
ive been running too much. the pressure on the shin can cause stress fracture
which can also lead to one year of recover. whoa thats a nightmare. im taking a break
for the following week. a real good break.
i just have to...im too tired of almost everything...especially track...
the interest is dying.
all i felt is pain and pain..

anyway. was searching about fitness and personal training provided in the gym around singapore...whoa. guess syed said is true. helping to form a very nice toned body is an art itself.i like it. as it sounds ART...
i wanna learnt more about it...
its an ART. and i wanna get it for myself too.

cool luh.

2008-07-02T09:11:00.002+08:00

Yesterday was a really productive day.
and we really have to act onto it.
being leaders...being pillars is never easy.

thanks to ms sally for such a good advice.
she's out gym instructor...and has share us real great
experiences that she had. thank you.

now, its time to jump into gears...gear one is now gear 6.
and now. speed defines everything for me.

2008-06-26T20:58:00.003+08:00

so sorry for the late update.
okay i gotta admit it. im tired of blogging?!..
kinda lost interest about it. well, now the feeling is there.
that good feeling.

okay. can i say ouch!. as in realli ouch>!. haa. i know its bad to complaint.
but coach gave me a real good run yesterday. and whats the workout?. okay it is
just 300m x 10 times, with the walk to starting as recovery. aa, gotta admit, kinda shock becux im the only one doing a different workout than the rest. well, coach....i still got a long way to go. push me hard and i will try even harder. thanks coach.

hmm, this week has been real great. body watch gym can be real boring and slacking. but with sb brudders of islam. nothing is boring. its fun walking around the school. whoa. haa. i realli love my classmate and trackteam. initially, the brudder of islam is started by khalis. he and his idea. haa. damn funny la....teaching is bought to track...and now everyone combine to be brudders of islam. why? because we mix our jokes till people can cry out. haa. one victim, malik bro....eh naz. dun say that lah!...haha.
well, not only because hanging out with them is nice, but also, i managed to did myself a real good training. on mon, i had a real crazy training of weights and core in the morning. and damn it, once i got home, i kinda got knock out. haa.lol.

ive got one of the best classmate ever! sb! love ya ppl.

tues is a long run, and i managed to do it in the morning too but at the treadmill. still! haa. i realise the treadmill kinda help to improve my running balance. haa. power la. weds training was a real good one. and im still feeling the aching now. good! thats more like it.

today, i had a good lesson my mr james wong about resistance training!. ehs damn cool luh!. i can actually help myself with it. aha!. core training, circuit training and all the repetitions needed to grow different kinds of muscles for some sports man. haa. hmm, didnt train today. i kinda figure out that i need a rest! so thats why i got time to blog. hehe.

what else huh. ooh yahs. just downloaded a few rap and hiphop songs. and whoa. real nice one la. haa. been listening to it...hmm. where's the rock songs?!. well, i still waiting for those bands to release a real good album!.haa. im waiting!.

hmm. personal fitness assesment is another headache. i need to find 8 people not! from sw!. and its tought la...hopefully some people can help me do so!....hehe.

hmm. usually people wrote blogs to complaint. well true. like what my fren mg saes. haa. nthin seems enough in this world to us. yups. hmm im kinda hopeful that what im listening from different people is not true. well, i don't know what really happen but one thing for sure. we said nothing and im sure there are no real problems from there. why another problem when everyone is fine. we ourselves think differently, so lets make sure that i do not jump into any conclusion. i only want to hear things that is said from the person himself. if not. i shall not care. there's no real problems from me to you. you are a friend to me. and for some reason i don't care much about you because you didnt say anything. lets not create enemies shall we. pass down msgs are never accurate. and every actions has real reasons behind it....
hoefully, we'll stay as it should be. ive said nothing but i don't know why people say words for me. we don create enemies....because...

shall not say further.

go nyp track. all the way. make that sweat pay. jia you!
leave.

2008-06-17T21:07:00.003+08:00

Finally, got time to update...crazy days i had.

fri, finally meet syazwan,razzaq and adi. and what the hell, syazwan told me he got a girlfriend! wth. congrats to him! he's a real nice guy i know for the past few years..he deserve it...unlike me. haa. people always think about me the wrong way...sometimes, being nice is just wrong. they get the wrong idea. so be bad? u ask them. wtf, they called me nonok all these. they're the ones who are being that. not me...im still me...

and also outing with the athletics brotherhood. we went to chill at vivo and catch some movies! haa. the brotherhood are myself,akid,malik,sihao,hafiz,naish and also phillip and rahman who was not there for some reason...
well, i think track will be different after some seniors left us. hopefully, we still remain in contact and the seniors has realli taught me alot.
dun blame us for having this group, its just happen?!. haa. like everyone does. we are just a group of idiots who are much closer in track. haa.

sat, went out with my secondary sch friends despite the tireness feelings...
good thing though. did get to enjoy some noce times...

my brother got his handphone bills and its $1,300. omg. was damn shocked...called singtel...things are yet settled. dumb him. dunno what is he doing. did not off his gprs. whatever lar, luckily ur taking your o's. the family is behind u...

sun was father's day. and family outing to sentosa! had fun playing frisbees and talking nonsense under the sun. haa.

mon, went for a checkup about the recent problems i had which i fainted during the berkelah trip. doctor said that, there's isnt enough water in my body such that the water is just to cold and it causes my skins to open up. making blood pressure to moved up my brain. that explains my giddiness and blackout.
doctor prescribe me with some medicines for like 60 dollars...
and also mc for sports activities for one week...and i dun care, i must train soon!

tue, which is today, working in gym is fun but can be real boring at times. luckily there's a mr lionel event to help out and we got free mac meal for that! woo!. haa...had some nice class sessions with our gym instructor. interesting facts realli.
had a real rest today. i realli need a break. doctor did told me that im suffering from fatigue and mental pressure. how he noes that?!...

i noe its random, im missing some gangstarz friends..
why shud i?...damn...
still, i wish they knoe...

whatever it is, i know i will reach to that level of expectations i made for myself. ive got a target. and i have to achieve it no matter what. both studies and sports...im more determine than ever. ill work harder and harder. i shall not care about what others say about me, only stupid people think that i will die. damn dumb, they just think too much. i know my body limits. what an ass.
my sport is used to be football.
and im soo good at it...
and its all over now...
now is track...
the track is where i should conquer now...
its now or never....
and i will do it. i will keep improving...
i don't warn people who competes with me...
just so they know, i love challenges. i never back down from it.
ill beat you down.

2008-06-12T00:39:00.002+08:00

Hai, yesterday was so fun...
just three of us and yet...
studies were made about republic poly studying style...
kinda shock the way they do critical thinking...
and it is such a memorable day for me. may not be for both of them...
but it will be.such memories in the past came back, and i felt good and
bad about what happened. as sweetest as it can be, as sourish it can be too...
can i stay at one moment of a time?...
can i just turn back the time...
that looks again, that feelings again...
and ive to tell myself... nazri! NO! dun even think about it...
and i never knew the pain can still be felt...

those memories...hai...
must forget.must must forget.
try to understand about for letters. i still cant. ive lost total faith in it.
why have another broken heart..

anyway, today is the handling of body watch gym to us.
ill be the assistant admin manager and the only one!. so i guess will be
helping both admin managers! chor hoon and ismail! if you are reading this! ill
do my best to help your work as sucessful as it can. i will!.

wonder hows my life gonna be this few weeks...so so busy...it gonna be. pray hard it will be alright...

dEja Vu

2008-06-10T20:29:00.002+08:00

reports after reports...
and im finally done with them!.

whoa.malaysia trip is a blast. haa.
nice!

and basically, i kinda compared hows my life used to be
in the past...its a big change...
now, its too happening...
just too happening...
ups and downs...
expect the unexpected...

all those events...those travelling made...
all over singapore has kinda tire me out...
and finally this week is the last one. so so glad about it...
i learnt alot for this past few weeks..
and now, its bodywatch gym...
no real breaks.
no holidays...
and its about time management.

2008-06-04T23:53:00.003+08:00

im dead tired...
events after events...
when issit gonna be over...
i need sleep...
a real good night sleep...
but when its gonna be?...

i have to train harder and harder...
pushing no limits. and till then...
winning a real hardwork is only that all matters....

im tired...
so so tired...
i need a real break. please...